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The chart below shows the percentage of school leavers entering higher education ie colleges and universities and graduate earnings 1 year after graduation

The chart below shows the percentage of school leavers entering higher education ie colleges and universities and graduate earnings 1 year after graduation jKXp
The two pie charts describe the total percentage of school-leavers who continue to attend university and graduate earnings one year after their graduation, based on national averages. Overall, the percentage of students who entering universities increased significantly between 1987 and 2007. Moreover, two pie charts shows that the rate of unemployment dropped significantly while the percentage of students who graduated one year after graduation earning less than the national everage increased very high. In 1987, the total number of graduates who continued their education was only 14%. This is much lower than the figure given in 2007. One year after graduation, the graduate earnings were as follows. The largest category was reported for those graduates who earned “More Than the National Average” at 46%. The percentage reported for those that earned “Less Than the National Average” was at 25%, which is almost half the former group. The graduates who earned “More Than Double the national Average” were reported at 18%, and ‘Unemployed’ graduates represented only 11% of all students. In 2007, those students who were going to enter higher education had increased significantly to 35%. There was very little change for the “More Than the National Average” group, with an increase of only 1%. The most substantial change can be seen in the group of graduates who earned “Less Than the National Average”, with a difference that had almost doubled to 45%. Unlike this, the remaining two categories decreased quite a bit. The group of “More Than Double the National Average”, decreased by 13%, and the “Unemployed” group went down by 8%, respectively.
The two pie charts
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describe
the total
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percentage
of school-leavers
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who
continue to attend university and
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graduate
earnings one year after their graduation, based on
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national
averages.

Overall
, the
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percentage
of students
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who
entering universities increased
significantly
between 1987 and 2007.
Moreover
, two pie charts
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shows
that the rate of unemployment dropped
significantly
while the
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percentage
of students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
graduated one year after graduation earning less than the
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national
Possible spelling mistake found.
everage
increased
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very
high. In 1987, the total number of
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graduates
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who
continued their education was
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only
14%. This is much lower than the figure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
in 2007. One year after graduation, the
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graduate
earnings were as follows. The largest category
was reported
for those
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graduates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earned
“More Than the
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National
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Average”
at 46%. The
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percentage
reported for those that
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earned
“Less Than the
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National
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Average”
was at 25%, which is almost half the former
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group
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
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graduates
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who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earned
“More Than Double the
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national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Average”
were reported
at 18%, and ‘Unemployed’
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graduates
represented
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only
11% of all students.

In 2007, those students
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who
were going to enter higher education had increased
significantly
to 35%. There was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
for the “More Than the
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National
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Average”
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group
, with an increase of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
1%. The most substantial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
can be
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seen
in the
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group
of
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graduates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earned
“Less Than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
National
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Average”
, with a difference that had almost doubled to 45%. Unlike this, the remaining two categories decreased quite a bit. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of “More Than Double the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
National
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Average”
, decreased by 13%, and the “Unemployed”
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group
went down by 8%,
respectively
.
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IELTS academic The chart below shows the percentage of school leavers entering higher education ie colleges and universities and graduate earnings 1 year after graduation

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
263 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
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  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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