Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The chart below shows the distribution of workforce in various occupation of the Great Britain, in 1932 and 1992.

The chart below shows the distribution of workforce in various occupation of the Great Britain, in 1932 and 1992. Pr0Vg
The given pie charts trace the percentage change in the distribution of workforce, over five different categories, including the ‘jobless’ in Great Britain, in the years 1932 and 1992. Overall, the sector employing maximum workforce in the year 1932 was Industry, which was replaced by the service sector in the year 1992. Nearly half of the total workforce(45%) was engaged in the industrial sector, in the year 1932, however, the top place was occupied by service sector, engaging 52% of all the employees in the year 1992. The sector with least percentage of workforce in 1932 was government, which grew five-fold, from the year 1932 (3%) to 1992(15%). Furthermore, the percentage in unemployed category decreased by 15%, coming down to just 10% in 1992. A similar decrease was observed in Agriculture and Fishing sector, where the proportion was reduced by one-third of what it was in 1932, in 1992. Interestingly, the biggest expansion of 37% was registered by service sector, which stood at a whopping 52% in the latter of the two years.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
pie charts trace the percentage
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in the distribution of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workforce
, over five
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
categories, including the ‘jobless’ in Great Britain, in the years 1932 and 1992.
Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
employing maximum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workforce
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1932 was Industry, which
was replaced
by the service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1992.
Nearly
half of the total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workforce(45%)
was engaged
in the industrial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
, in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1932,
however
, the top place
was occupied
by service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
, engaging 52% of all the employees in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1992. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
with
A determiner is probably missing here: "the least".
least
percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workforce
in 1932 was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
, which grew five-fold, from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1932 (3%) to 1992(15%).
Furthermore
, the percentage in unemployed category decreased by 15%, coming down to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
10% in 1992. A similar decrease
was observed
in Agriculture and Fishing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
, where the proportion was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
by one-third of what it was in 1932, in 1992.
Interestingly
, the biggest expansion of 37%
was registered
by service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
, which stood at a whopping 52% in the latter of the two years.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS academic The chart below shows the distribution of workforce in various occupation of the Great Britain, in 1932 and 1992.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
173 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • The chart below shows the distribution of workforce in various occupation of the Great Britain, in 1932 and 1992.