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The chart Below shows the amount of money per week spent on fast food in Britain.The graphs shows the trends in consumptions of the fast foods.

The chart Below shows the amount of money per week spent on fast food in Britain. The graphs shows the trends in consumptions of the fast foods. oRpRB
Above bar graph depicts how an individual person according to Income groups had spent pences per week to bought fast food. It can be clearly seen that the Hamburger was widely choice over a period of time by each group of people. To begin with Fish and Chips was most favourable for low income groups where as the Pizza was a list choice. Average income group preferred Hamburger first followed by the Fish and Chips. In contrast, for high earning people Hamburger was the top choice and second was Pizza. Coming to the line graph, which illustrate overall uses of the fast food in the grams over a period from 1970 to 1990. It's clear that the Hamburger and the pizza were widely consumed by Britain people. There was similar positive Trend till 1980 for both but after that Hamburger usage was drastically increased and resulted as a first choice. however there was a negative trend seen for Fish and Chips between 1970 to 1985. By 1990 it was average consumption was around 250 grams. . In conclusion all the group had spent good pance on hamburger and the pizza and average on fish and chips over 1970 to 1990
Above bar graph depicts how an individual person according to Income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
had spent
Possible spelling mistake found.
pences
per week to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food.

It can be
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the Hamburger was
widely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choice
over a period of time by each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with Fish and Chips was most
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourable' is British English.
favourable
for low income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
Did you mean "whereas"?
where as
the Pizza was a list
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choice
. Average income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
preferred Hamburger
first
followed by the Fish and Chips.
In contrast
, for high earning
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
Hamburger was the top
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choice
and second was Pizza.

Coming to the line graph, which illustrate
overall
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food in the grams over a period from 1970 to 1990. It's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the Hamburger and the pizza were
widely
consumed by Britain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. There was similar
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
Trend till 1980 for both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
after that Hamburger usage was
drastically
increased and resulted as a
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choice
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
however
there was a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
trend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
for Fish and Chips
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 1970 and 1985".
between 1970 to 1985
. By 1990 it was average consumption was around 250 grams.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.


In conclusion
all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
had spent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Possible spelling mistake found.
pance
on hamburger and the pizza and average on fish and chips over 1970 to 1990

IELTS academic The chart Below shows the amount of money per week spent on fast food in Britain. The graphs shows the trends in consumptions of the fast foods.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
199 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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