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The chart below gives the information about the demand of people in Fergana city, for different cars in 2018.

The chart below gives the information about the demand of people in Fergana city, for different cars in 2018. kgRDn
The bar demonstrates the difference between the demands of people in London for six types of vehicles, such as Tesla, Ferrari, Royce, BMW, Volkswagen Golf and Ford Focus; in 2018. Although, the second biggest figure was reported for Volkswagen Golf at the same time that the shares for Royce and BMW were in the same scale. There was a tremendous difference between the proportions of Tesla and Ferrari, with the former of Tesla standing first with 90%, in contrast, Ferrari's users were 60% smaller. In addition, as for Royce and BMW, the latter was responsible for the same amount of 65% for both cars. Furthermore, the disparity between the two figures of Volkswagen Golf and Ford Focus was one fifth, which in the former, Volkswagen Golf had the largest proportion with the share of 80%.
The bar demonstrates the difference between the demands of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in London for six types of vehicles, such as Tesla, Ferrari, Royce, BMW, Volkswagen Golf and Ford Focus; in 2018.

Although, the second biggest figure
was reported
for Volkswagen Golf at the same time that the shares for Royce and BMW were in the same scale.

There was a tremendous difference between the proportions of Tesla and Ferrari, with the former of Tesla standing
first
with 90%,
in contrast
, Ferrari's users were 60% smaller.
In addition
, as for Royce and BMW, the latter was responsible for the same amount of 65% for both cars.
Furthermore
, the disparity between the two figures of Volkswagen Golf and Ford Focus was one fifth, which in the former, Volkswagen Golf had the largest proportion with the share of 80%.
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IELTS academic The chart below gives the information about the demand of people in Fergana city, for different cars in 2018.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
135 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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