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the changes in the number of women and men worker in six sectors in Freedonia in the year 1975 and 1995

the changes in the number of women and men worker in six sectors in Freedonia in the year 1975 and 1995 q6OpD
The charts compare and contrast data on the changes in the number of women and men worker in six sectors in Freedonia in the year 1975 and 1995. Overall, a clear look at the graphs highlights the fact that the number of both women and men worker in public sector with non defence and wholesale and retail trade were the highest in the graphs while the figure for public sector with defence was always the lowest throughout the period shown. Looking at the charts in the more detail, in 1975, the number of female and male employees in manufacturing and the public sector (non-defense) was 300 women and 650 men in manufacturing and 650 women and 850 men in the public sector (non-defense), respectively, and the figures remained stable for the next 20 years. In the other sectors, while the number of men worker witnessed a stability, the figure for women employees saw a slight increase, from roughly 250, 440, 130 and 30 females in 1975 to approximately 550, 800, 450 and 100 woman in communications, wholesale and retail trade, finanve or banking and public sector (defense) in the order over the same time.
The charts compare and contrast data on the
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changes
in the
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number
of
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women
and
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men
worker in six
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sectors
in
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Freedonia
in the year 1975 and 1995.

Overall
, a
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clear
look at the graphs highlights the fact that the
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number
of both
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women
and
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men
worker in
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public
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sector
with non
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defence
and wholesale and retail trade were the highest in the graphs while the figure for
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public
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sector
with
Possible spelling mistake. 'defence' is British English.
defence
was always the lowest throughout the period shown.

Looking at the charts in the more detail, in 1975, the
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number
of female and male employees in manufacturing and the
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public
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sector
(non-defense) was 300
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women
and 650
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men
in manufacturing and 650
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women
and 850
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men
in the
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public
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sector
(non-defense),
respectively
, and the figures remained stable for the
next
20 years.

In the other
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sectors
, while the
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number
of
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men
worker witnessed a stability, the figure for
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women
employees
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saw
a slight increase, from roughly 250, 440, 130 and 30 females in 1975 to approximately 550, 800, 450 and 100 woman in communications, wholesale and retail trade,
Possible spelling mistake found.
finanve
or banking and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
(defense) in the order over the same time.

IELTS academic the changes in the number of women and men worker in six sectors in Freedonia in the year 1975 and 1995

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
194 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
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  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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