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The bar graph shows the average housing costs in three different regions for two different years

The bar graph shows the average housing costs in three different regions for two different years aVxlV
The bar chart demonstrates the average housing cost of rural, subarban and urban areas for two different years 2005 and 2015. The average housing cost is in dollars. To commence with, there was a significant difference in housing cost in all three areas in both 2005 and 2015. The average housing cost in rural areas was $75, 000 in 2005 while this figure was slightly increased to $125, 000 in 2005. In 2005 Average housing cost in subarban region was moderate as $100, 000which was almost tripled, rising to $275, 000 in 2015. Moreover, average urban housing cost was $150, 000 in 2005 which was doubled to $300, 000 in 2015. Overall, there was highest housing cost in urban areas whereas lowest housing cost in rural areas but they rose significantly more in the time period between two different years.
The bar chart demonstrates the
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average
housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of rural,
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subarban
and urban
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areas
for two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
years 2005 and 2015. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
average
housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
is in dollars. To commence with, there was a significant difference in housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
in all three
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
in both 2005 and 2015. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
average
housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
in rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
was $75, 000 in 2005 while this figure was
slightly
increased to $125, 000 in 2005. In 2005
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Average
housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
subarban
region was moderate as $100, 000which was almost tripled, rising to $275, 000 in 2015.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
average
urban housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
was $150, 000 in 2005 which
was doubled
to $300, 000 in 2015.
Overall
, there was
A determiner is probably missing here: "the highest".
highest
housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
in urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
whereas lowest housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
in rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they rose
significantly
more in the time period between two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
years.
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IELTS academic The bar graph shows the average housing costs in three different regions for two different years

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
140 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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