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The bar graph compares changes in the global sales of several types of digital games over six years from 2000 to 2006.

The bar graph compares changes in the global sales of several types of digital games over six years from 2000 to 2006. 5LglP
The bar graph compares changes in the global sales of several types of digital games over six years from 2000 to 2006. Overall, there was an upward trend in the sales of mobile phone games, online games and handheld games, but a downward trend in console games over the period given. Let’s first consider the data in the graph. From the start until the end of the period, handheld games stayed as the most popular type. Console games were the second most well-known, but the proportion slowly declined in the following years and ended up with the lowest rate in 2006. Mobile phone games and online games did not exist in the beginning; however, their sales continued to increase gradually which eventually exceeded the rates of console games. Regarding the worldwide sales of handheld games, they began at almost 12 billion dollars then continued to rise and finally peaked at 18 billion dollars in 2006. Mobile phone and online games started to get attention between year 2001 and 2002. The rates of both categories fluctuated then stopped at 9 billion dollars for online games and a little bit above 6 billion for mobile phone games. On the other hand, the sales of console games started at about 6 billion dollars. This figure then reduced to two times since 2000, which it stopped at about 3 billion dollars in 2006. Should the trend persist in 2022, console games will be obsolete and stay out of use in the future, while the other three types will be widely known.
The bar graph compares
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the global
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sales
of several types of digital
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games
over six years from 2000 to 2006.

Overall
, there was an upward trend in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of mobile
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phone
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games
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and handheld
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games
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
a downward trend in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
console
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games
over the period
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
’s
first
consider the data in the graph. From the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
until the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period, handheld
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
stayed as the most popular type.
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Console
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
were the second most well-known,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the proportion
slowly
declined in the following years and ended up with the lowest rate in 2006. Mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
did not exist in the beginning;
however
, their
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sales
continued to increase
gradually
which
eventually
exceeded the rates of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
console
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. Regarding the worldwide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of handheld
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games
, they began at almost 12
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billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
then continued to rise and
finally
peaked at 18
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in 2006. Mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
attention between year 2001 and 2002. The rates of both categories fluctuated then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
at 9
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billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and a
Reduce redundancy by using "little" or "bit".
little bit
above 6
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billion
for mobile
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phone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
.
On the other hand
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
console
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
at about 6
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
. This figure then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
to two times since 2000, which it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
at about 3
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in 2006.

Should the trend persist in 2022,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
console
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
will be obsolete and stay out of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in the future, while the other three types will be
widely
known.
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IELTS academic The bar graph compares changes in the global sales of several types of digital games over six years from 2000 to 2006.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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