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the bar chart shows the reason why adults choose to take up educational course. the pie chart shows how adults believe the costs of their education should be shared.

the bar chart shows the reason why adults choose to take up educational course. the pie chart shows how adults believe the costs of their education should be shared. rGkDL
The bar graph depicts the reason' to study by adult and pie chart elicits how fees should be structured for the education. Focusing on the graph it can be inferred that majority of while adults study for their current job. The top three reasons given by 44%, 40%, and 38% adults are for the current job, interest in the subject and to qualify respectively. On the contrary, only 20% of adults show to take education qualification as they enjoy studying. Least of all 9% have motivation in completing education qualification as they would chance to meet new people. While 12-/ adults study so that they can change their jobs The pie chart shows how adults want their fees should be charged. They want that 35% of their tuition bill to be paid by the employer and the other 25% should be levied on the government. So that they are only liable to pay 40% of total fees.
The bar graph depicts the reason' to study by adult and pie chart elicits how fees should
be structured
for the education.

Focusing on the graph it can
be inferred
that majority of while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
study for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
job. The top three reasons
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by 44%, 40%, and 38%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
are for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
job, interest in the subject and to qualify
respectively
.
On the contrary
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
20% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
to take education qualification as they enjoy studying. Least of all 9% have motivation in completing education qualification as they would chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. While 12-/
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
study
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
jobs


The pie chart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
want their fees should
be charged
. They want that 35% of their tuition bill to
be paid
by the employer and the other 25% should
be levied
on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.
“So that” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
So that
they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
liable to pay 40% of total fees.
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IELTS academic the bar chart shows the reason why adults choose to take up educational course. the pie chart shows how adults believe the costs of their education should be shared.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
157 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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