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The bar chart shows the information about student accomodation at one US university in 2013

The bar chart shows the information about student accomodation at one US university in 2013 wO0Lr
The bar chart illustrates information about learners housing in one state in the United States university in 2013. Overall, the most of undergraduate students more prefered live in university dorminatory. Followed by them several students lived in shared apartment. According to the graph in 2013 the majority of undergraduate students prefered live in university dorminatory (4 thousand) of student. Followed by them shared apartment was common amidst these students around 4000. Also in married student housing lived far fewer undergraduate learners than graduate students(almost 500 and just under 1000 respectively). In 2013, student of magistracy accommodated in shared apartment (around 1000). Furthermore graduate students existed in shared house and married student housing. While the least number of graduate students was about 200 who lived with parents. Finally graduate learners who lived in 6 various accommodation in one state in the United States university in 2013 was popular until 1000 of students.
The bar chart illustrates information about learners housing in one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
state
in the United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
in 2013.
Overall
, the
Consider using "most undergraduate" or "most of the undergraduate".
most of undergraduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
more
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "preferred", the past tense form of the verb 'prefer'?
prefered
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
Possible spelling mistake found.
dorminatory
. Followed by them several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lived
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
apartment. According to the graph in 2013 the majority of undergraduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "preferred", the past tense form of the verb 'prefer'?
prefered
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
Possible spelling mistake found.
dorminatory
(4 thousand) of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
. Followed by them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
apartment was common amidst these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
around 4000.
Also
in married
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lived
far fewer undergraduate learners than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduate
students(almost 500 and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under 1000
respectively
). In 2013,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
of magistracy accommodated in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
apartment (around 1000).
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Furthermore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
existed in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
and married
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
housing.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
the least number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
was about 200 who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lived
with parents.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Finally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduate
learners who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lived
in 6 various accommodation in one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
state
in the United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
in 2013 was popular until 1000 of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.

IELTS academic The bar chart shows the information about student accomodation at one US university in 2013

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
151 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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