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The bar chart shows the distribution of employment among agriculture, services, industries in three countries in 1980 and projected distribution in 2020.

The bar chart shows the distribution of employment among agriculture, services, industries in three countries in 1980 and projected distribution in 2020. j9xWp
The bar charts compare and contrast the employment distribution in three different fields: agriculture, services and industries in three countries in 1980 and forecasted distribution in 2020. It is obvious that the highest distribution of country A and C is in services while in country B is agriculture. According to the charts, in 1980, the employment distribution for agriculture in country B was over 50%. This figure was much larger than the proportion in country A and country C which just roughly 20% and nearly 2%, respectively. Besides, 30% of the total distribution in country A was belonged to industries while this figure in country B was 10% less than country A. The employment invest for industries purposes in country C was nearly 40%. Moreover, the main distribution of country A and country C was for services with nearly 50% and over 60%, respectively while this number in country B just accounted for 20%. Specifically, in 2020, the distribution for agriculture is predicted to decrease in three countries. The investment for industries is forecasted to decrease in country A and C while this figure is likely to increase in country B. The major distribution for services is estimated about 80% of the total in country C while this number in country A is likely about 50% and in country B is just around 40%.
The bar charts compare and contrast the employment
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distribution
in three
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different
fields: agriculture,
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services
and
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industries
in three
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countries
in 1980 and forecasted
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distribution
in 2020.

It is obvious that the highest
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distribution
of
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country
A and C is in
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services
while in
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country
B is agriculture.

According to the charts, in 1980, the employment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
distribution
for agriculture in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
B was over 50%. This figure was much larger than the proportion in
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country
A and
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country
C which
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
roughly 20% and
nearly
2%,
respectively
.
Besides
, 30% of the total
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distribution
in
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country
A
was belonged
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
while this figure in
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country
B was 10% less than
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country
A. The employment invest for
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industries
purposes in
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country
C was
nearly
40%.
Moreover
, the main
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distribution
of
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country
A and
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country
C was for
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services
with
nearly
50% and over 60%,
respectively
while this number in
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country
B
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
accounted for 20%.

Specifically
, in 2020, the
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distribution
for agriculture
is predicted
to decrease in three
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countries
. The investment for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
is forecasted
to decrease in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
A and C while this figure is likely to increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
B. The major
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distribution
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
is estimated
about 80% of the total in
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country
C while this number in
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country
A is likely about 50% and in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
B is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
around 40%.

IELTS academic The bar chart shows the distribution of employment among agriculture, services, industries in three countries in 1980 and projected distribution in 2020.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
224 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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