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The bar chart illustrates the number of people in the Uk eating more than 5 portions of vegetables and fish per day.

The bar chart illustrates the number of people in the Uk eating more than 5 portions of vegetables and fish per day. xDgAo
The presented bar graph depicts the information about the proportion of people who intake 5 or more portions of vegetables and fish per day from 2011 to 2017. The data has been calibrated in percentage. To begin with, in 2011, the highest number of women eat 5 or more portion of vegetables and fish per day, which accounted of 20%. These rate remained same in next two years. After that this percentage rose dramatically and peaked at high to 36% in 2016, before fall of 30% in the end of the period. Likewise, men showed cosidrabely rise throughout the given time span, except 2016 because at that time it decreased slightly. In 2011, the number of men who consumed 5 or more vegetables and fish per day was about 17%, but at the end of the period these number reached to roughly one quater. Moreover, children showed some fluctuation in their number, which started from 10% in 2011 then describe some fluctuation trend and reached to 15% in 2017. Overall, it is manifest from the graph that the number of people who consumed vegetables and fish per day was increased throughout the time. Also, women showed the highest percentage in contrast to men and children.
The presented bar graph depicts the information about the proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who intake 5 or more portions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vegetables
and fish per day from 2011 to 2017. The data has
been calibrated
in percentage.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, in 2011, the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of women eat 5 or more portion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vegetables
and fish per day, which accounted of 20%. These rate remained same in
next
two years. After that this percentage rose
dramatically
and peaked at high to 36% in 2016,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
fall of 30% in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period.
Likewise
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
Possible spelling mistake found.
cosidrabely
rise throughout the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
time span, except 2016
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
at that time it decreased
slightly
. In 2011, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
who consumed 5 or more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vegetables
and fish per day was about 17%,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period these
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number
reached to roughly one
Possible spelling mistake found.
quater
.

Moreover
, children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fluctuation in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
from 10% in 2011 then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "fluctuations"?
fluctuation
trend and reached to 15% in 2017.

Overall
, it is manifest from the graph that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who consumed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vegetables
and fish per day
was increased
throughout the time.
Also
, women
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
the highest percentage
in contrast
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and children.
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IELTS academic The bar chart illustrates the number of people in the Uk eating more than 5 portions of vegetables and fish per day.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
205 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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