Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The bar chart illustrates how much free time

The bar chart illustrates how much free time Orm1j
The bar chart illustrates how much free time is available for male and female in different roles during 1998. The units are calibrated in hours per week. Overall, it is evident that more leisure is enjoyed by unemployed and retired workers while it is the least for full time employees. Surprisingly, male working for part time are never free. Firstly, unemployed and retired people are less occupied as the men in both categories are not working for almost 85 hours a week while female are slighly busier than men as they are not occupied for around 80 hours per week. However, Women enjoy less leisure than men in all the given employment categories. Employed women in both full time and part time ways are free for around 10 hours than the housewives who are unoccupied for 50 hours in a week. Furthermore, full time employed males are almost 5 hours less busier than female.
The bar chart illustrates how much free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
is available for male and female in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
roles during 1998. The units
are calibrated
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
per week.

Overall
, it is evident that more leisure
is enjoyed
by unemployed and retired workers while it is the least for full
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
employees.
Surprisingly
, male working for part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
are never free.

Firstly
, unemployed and retired
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are less occupied as the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
in both categories are not working for almost 85
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
a week while female are
Possible spelling mistake found.
slighly
busier than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
as they are not occupied for around 80
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
per week.

However
, Women enjoy less leisure than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
in all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
employment categories. Employed women in both full
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
ways are free for around 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
than the housewives who
are unoccupied
for 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
in a week.
Furthermore
, full
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
employed males are almost 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
Non-standard use of the comparative or superlative. Did you mean "less busy"?
less busier
than female.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS academic The bar chart illustrates how much free time

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
154 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts
  • 6band
    Cherry Jam making process
    The diagram illustrates the whole process, through which the cherry jam is made. It is clear that there are nine main stages including collecting the ingredients, processing steps and packaging, respectively First of all, a sheet is spread on the ground in order to easily protect and gather the che...
  • 6band
    the piictures show the changes
    The diagrams show the developments that had been taken in Shipsmouth over a period 15 years from 1995 to 2010. At first glance, it is noticeable that shipsmouth witnessed a dramatic transformation over the given period, becoming considerably less green and more built up. Looking at the pictures in...
  • 7band
    the pictures show the changes
    The diagrams show the developments that had been taken in Ships mouth over a period 15 years from 1995 to 2010. At first glance, it is noticeable that ships mouth witnessed a dramatic transformation over the given period, becoming considerably less green and more built up. Looking at the pictures ...
  • 5.5band
    The bar graph and line graph place with the data about amount of money spent by Britishers on junk food and consumption of fast food
    The provided bar graph and I am graph illustrate the data about amount of money, Spent by britisher around junk food and line graph reveal the consumption of fast food. To initiate with, it has been seen that the high income britisher expanded most of the money by purchasing hamburgers per week. Mo...
  • 6.5band
    The table below presents the perceptions of chief executive officers and their partners as too the main sources of stress in the CEO lifestyle
    The table shows the opinions of the officers of the company and their partners for the causes of stress in officers' lifestyles. Overall, the majority of them opines that the main reasons behind their sufferings are time pressure and deadlines. To begin with, more than half of the CEOs agree that t...
  • 6band
    contribution of different industrial sectors towards economy of Turkey in year 2000 and 2016.
    These pie chart shows the contribution of different industrial sectors towards economy of Turkey in year 2000 and 2016. Overall it can be observed that Agriculture was the most significant sector during year 2000 whereas construction contributes the least in the same year. However in 2016 health ca...





Get more results for topic:
  • The bar chart illustrates how much free time