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The bar chart illustrates how many Japanese traveled overseas from 1985 to 1995, and the line graph describes the percentage of the Japanese tourist market for Australia.

The bar chart illustrates how many Japanese traveled overseas from 1985 to 1995, and the line graph describes the percentage of the Japanese tourist market for Australia. 2rmEw
The bar chart illustrates how many Japanese traveled overseas from 1985 to 1995, and the line graph describes the percentage of the Japanese tourist market for Australia. Overall, the number of Japanese tourists tends to increase over a decade, and Australians' distribution among Japanese tourists tends to fluctuate. As can be seen from the bar chart, from 1985 to 1990, the number of Japanese visitors steadily increased from 5 million to approximately 11 million. But in 1991, the number of Japanese tourists dropped slightly to 10. 5 million. Visitor numbers remained stable from 1992 to 1994 with 13 million visitors, then spiked to 15 million in 1995. Concerning the line graph, in 1985, only 2% of the 5 million tourists visited Australia. In 1989, the proportion of Japanese visitors in Australia had steadily increased to 5%, however, this proportion had decreased to about 4. 2% in 1990. Until 1994, the percentage of Japanese visitors to Australia visits peaked at 6. 2%, but this rate had dropped to 6% in 1995.
The bar chart illustrates how
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many
Japanese traveled overseas from 1985 to 1995, and the line graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describes
the percentage of the Japanese
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tourist
market for Australia.

Overall
, the
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number
of Japanese
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tourists
tends to increase over a decade, and Australians' distribution among Japanese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
tends to fluctuate.

As can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the bar chart, from 1985 to 1990, the
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number
of Japanese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
steadily
increased from 5
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million
to approximately 11
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million
.
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But
in 1991, the
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number
of Japanese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
dropped
slightly
to 10. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
.
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Visitor
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numbers
remained stable from 1992 to 1994 with 13
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million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
, then spiked to 15
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million
in 1995.

Concerning the line graph, in 1985,
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only
2% of the 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
visited Australia. In 1989, the proportion of Japanese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
in Australia had
steadily
increased to 5%,
however
, this proportion had decreased to about 4. 2% in 1990. Until 1994, the percentage of Japanese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
to Australia visits peaked at 6. 2%,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this rate had dropped to 6% in 1995.
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IELTS academic The bar chart illustrates how many Japanese traveled overseas from 1985 to 1995, and the line graph describes the percentage of the Japanese tourist market for Australia.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
170 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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