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The bar chart (graph) demonstrates proportion of old population(65 and over) in three different countries such as Canada, Germany and UK.

The bar chart (graph) demonstrates proportion of old population(65 and over) in three different countries such as Canada, Germany and UK. Q1q3
The bar chart (graph) demonstrates proportion of old population(65 and over) in three different countries such as Canada, Germany and UK. Overall, it is clear that all three countries’ population have been experiencing ageing their nations and this trend is anticipated to continue by the end of period in question. (given) In 1980, a tenth of total citizens of Canada’s was at the age of 65 and over. In the UK the same group of people made up about 14% of nation. Over the next two decades the former had significant rose whereas the latter showed a small increase in the number of aged population which comprised the same level at 15% of total dwellers in both countries. By 2030, it is predicted for Canada to outrace United Kingdom in the amount of people who are 65 and over reaching approximately 22% in ratio of its total population which is going to be more by about 3% relatively Albion at the same period. As for Germany, between 1980 and 2000, rate of aged people(65 and over) increased from 15% to 20% which is expected to have a growth by 5% in the next 30 years reaching 25% in gross habitants.
The bar chart (graph) demonstrates proportion of
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old
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population(65
and
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over)
in three
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different
countries such as Canada, Germany and UK.
Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that all three countries’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
have been experiencing
Possible spelling mistake. 'ageing' is British English.
ageing
their nations and this trend
is anticipated
to continue by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of period in question. (
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
)

In 1980, a tenth of total citizens of Canada’s was at the age of 65 and
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over
. In the UK the same group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
made up about 14% of nation.
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Over
the
next
two decades the former had significant rose whereas the latter
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
increase in the number of aged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
which comprised the same level at 15% of total dwellers in both countries. By 2030, it
is predicted
for Canada to outrace United Kingdom in the amount of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are 65 and
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over
reaching approximately 22% in ratio of its total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
which is going to be more by about 3%
relatively
Albion at the same period.

As for Germany, between 1980 and 2000, rate of aged
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
(65 and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over)
increased from 15% to 20% which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to have a growth by 5% in the
next
30 years reaching 25% in gross habitants.
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IELTS academic The bar chart (graph) demonstrates proportion of old population(65 and over) in three different countries such as Canada, Germany and UK.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
200 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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