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The bar chart compares the percentage of the half time employees in four different countries of the UK in 1980 and 2010.

The bar chart compares the percentage of the half time employees in four different countries of the UK in 1980 and 2010. oRV2b
The bar chart compares the percentage of the half time employees in four different countries of the UK in 1980 and 2010. It is clear that in 2010, the percentage of part time employees was higher in three countries out of four than in 1980. However, in the Northern Ireland, this percentage was higher in 1980. According to the graph, in England, the percentage of part time workers was just over 30% in 2010, compared to roughly 25% in 1980. The value in Northern Ireland, which was the only country where the percentage in 1980 exceeded 2010, is approximately 15%. In Scotland, this value was around 10% in 1980. In 2010, the values in Northern Ireland and Scotland are close to 10% and 20%, respectively. The city with the highest value of the entire chart for 1980 and 2010 is Wales. Also, both of these values are between 30% and 40%.
The bar chart compares the
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percentage
of the half time employees in four
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different
countries of the UK in 1980 and 2010.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that in 2010, the
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percentage
of
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
part time
employees was higher in three countries out of four than in 1980.
However
, in the Northern Ireland, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
was higher in 1980.

According to the graph, in England, the
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percentage
of
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
part time
workers was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over 30% in 2010, compared to roughly 25% in 1980. The
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value
in Northern Ireland, which was the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
country where the
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percentage
in 1980 exceeded 2010, is approximately 15%. In Scotland, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
was around 10% in 1980. In 2010, the values in Northern Ireland and Scotland are close to 10% and 20%,
respectively
. The city with the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
of the entire chart for 1980 and 2010 is Wales.
Also
, both of these values are between 30% and 40%.
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IELTS academic The bar chart compares the percentage of the half time employees in four different countries of the UK in 1980 and 2010.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
151 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
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  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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