Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The bar chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in Australia, divided into three categories, from 2001- 2008.

The bar chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in Australia, divided into three categories, from 2001- 2008. erDx
The bar graph compares the accumulating time duration in sixty seconds of telephonic calls in Australia between 2001 to 2008. Moreover, the calls are local, national and international, and mobile, and it is measured in millions. Overall, it is clear that local calls were the highest followed by national and international ones, and the least one was mobile phone calls. In terms of local calls, they were the greatest and started at 72 billion in 2001, and it had gone up to 90 billion in 2005 before the figure went down to 72 billion in 2008. Regarding the national and international calls, they were the second-highest and stood at 38 billion in 2001, but they rose slightly until they went up to 61 billion in 2008. With regards to mobile phone calls, from 2001 to 2004, the figures were under 10 million. Afterward, it climbed slightly to 12 billion in 2005. Then, it had jumped considerably to 46 billion by the end of the period.
The bar graph compares the accumulating time duration in sixty seconds of telephonic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
in Australia
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 2001 and 2008".
between 2001 to 2008
.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
are local, national and international, and mobile, and it
is measured
in millions.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
were the highest followed by national and international ones, and the least one was mobile phone calls.

In terms of local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
, they were the greatest and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
at 72
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in 2001, and it had gone up to 90
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in 2005
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the figure went down to 72
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in 2008. Regarding the national and international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
, they were the second-highest and stood at 38
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in 2001,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they rose
slightly
until they went up to 61
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in 2008.

Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
With regards to
mobile phone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
, from 2001 to 2004, the figures were under 10 million. Afterward, it climbed
slightly
to 12
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in 2005. Then, it had jumped
considerably
to 46
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period.

IELTS academic The bar chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in Australia, divided into three categories, from 2001- 2008.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
165 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • The bar chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in Australia, divided into three categories, from 2001- 2008.