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the bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. This essay question is from Cambridge IELTS 13 Test 3 Writing Task 1.

the bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. This essay question is from Cambridge IELTS 13 Test 3 Writing Task 1. gbrgl
The bar chart illustrates the ten countries which manufactured and used the most of electricity typically in the period of 2014. The unit was represented by billion kilometres per hour. Overall, it can be seen obviously that China and United States were top two countries among other eight countries made use of energy, whereas Korea was the least amount in both production and consumption with opposite figure. Regarding with the highest rank countries, China leaded with first position in the category, which was accounted for 5, 398 b kWh in manufacturing and 5, 322 b kWh in spending. Similarly, US generated and consumed power with 4, 099 b kWh and 3, 866 b kWh respectively, making it the second place over the whole period. By contrast, Korea took over the last row due to its smallest measure with 485. 1 b kWh and 449. 5 b kWh individually in both sectors. However, Brazil and Germany also did not differentiate significantly compared to the Korea with merely a little quantity, which contributed to the final line-up. For the remaining nations, Russia and Japan fabricated 1, 057 b kWh and 936. 2 b kWh as well as used 1, 038 b kWh and 856. 7 b kWh throughout the year, which can be observed the producing and using ranges were not different appreciably. However, for India, Canada and France, it is noticeable that their generating rates were much more than absorbing ones (almost 200 b kWh).
The bar chart illustrates the ten
countries
which manufactured and
used
the
most of electricity
typically
in the period of 2014. The unit
was represented
by billion
kilometres
per hour.

Overall
, it can be
seen
obviously
that China and United States were top two
countries
among other eight
countries
made
use
of energy, whereas Korea was the least amount in both production and consumption with opposite figure.

Regarding with the highest rank
countries
, China leaded with
first
position in the category, which
was accounted
for 5, 398 b kWh in manufacturing and 5, 322 b kWh in spending.
Similarly
, US generated and consumed power with 4, 099 b kWh and 3, 866 b kWh
respectively
, making it the second place over the whole period. By contrast, Korea took over the last row due to its smallest measure with 485. 1 b kWh and 449. 5 b kWh
individually
in both sectors.
However
, Brazil and Germany
also
did not differentiate
significantly
compared to the Korea with
merely
a
little
quantity, which contributed to the final line-up.

For the remaining nations, Russia and Japan fabricated 1, 057 b kWh and 936. 2 b kWh
as well
as
used
1, 038 b kWh and 856. 7 b kWh throughout the year, which can
be observed
the producing and using ranges were not
different
appreciably
.
However
, for India, Canada and France, it is noticeable that their generating rates were much more than absorbing ones (almost 200 b kWh).
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IELTS academic the bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. This essay question is from Cambridge IELTS 13 Test 3 Writing Task 1.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
244 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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