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The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014.

The bar chart compares the creation and utilization of power in ten leading countries in 2014. It is measured in billions. Overall, it is clear that China was number 1 while the United States was number 2. However, the figure for other countries was low, and the lowest production and consumption were of Korean Republic. In terms of China, the amount of electricity consumption was 5, 398 billion and consumption was 5, 322 billion, followed by the United States, these numbers were 4, 099 and 3, 866 billion respectively. Regarding Russia and Japan, both were slightly similar Russia produced 1, 057 and Japan produce 936. 2 and consumed 1, 038 and 856. 7 billion sequentially. India made 871 billion in electricity and consumed 698. 8 billion. With regard to Canada, production and consumption were 618. 9 and 499. 9 billion kWh; however, in France and Brazil it is relatively similar, the former was accounted for 561. 2 and 530. 7 whilst later contributed to 462. 9 and 455. 8 billion consequentially. Moreover, the consumption of electricity in Germany was higher as compared to its production. In the Korean Republic, it was 485. 1 and 449. 5 production and consumption.
The bar chart compares the creation and utilization of power in ten leading countries in 2014. It
is measured
in billions.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that China was number 1 while the United States was number 2.
However
, the figure for other countries was low, and the lowest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
were of Korean Republic.

In terms of China, the amount of electricity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
was 5, 398
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
was 5, 322
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
, followed by the United States, these numbers were 4, 099 and 3, 866
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
respectively
. Regarding Russia and Japan, both were
slightly
similar Russia produced 1, 057 and Japan produce 936. 2 and consumed 1, 038 and 856. 7
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
sequentially
. India made 871
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in electricity and consumed 698. 8 billion.

With regard to Canada,
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production
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
were 618. 9 and 499. 9
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
kWh;
however
, in France and Brazil it is
relatively
similar, the former
was accounted
for 561. 2 and 530. 7 whilst later contributed to 462. 9 and 455. 8
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
consequentially
.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
of electricity in Germany was higher
Comparison requires “than”, not ‘then’ nor ‘as’.
as
compared to its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
. In the Korean Republic, it was 485. 1 and 449. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
.
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IELTS academic The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
199 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
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  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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