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the bar chart below shows the percentage of people living alone by 5 different age group in the US between 1850 and 2000.

the bar chart below shows the percentage of people living alone by 5 different age group in the US between 1850 and 2000. wBnwE
The following bar chart compares the percentage of individuals who live on their own according to five age groups between 17 to 64 years old in the United States between 1850 and 2000. Overall, it is clear that the percentage of people tending to live on their own was increasing in mentioned period of time. While adults between 55-64 years old were ranked as the highest percentage among the others, people under 27 constantly measured the least. Although in 1850 no under 37 years old lived alone, in 1900 27 to 36 years old individuals gradually rose, with approximately 2%. At the same time, adult between 37 and 54 equally obtained 2 percentage, but in 1900 people from 27 to 36 years old overtook the younger adults. In the year 1950 the first group up 17 to 26 years old adults, with merely 2% were found, whereas it drastically grew doubled by the next 50 years. Surprisingly people who were between 37 to 64 years old share the same percentage before 1950, While the percentage of people between 47-54 and 55-64 climb to their peaks by 3 and 9 percentage in 1950, and 13 and 17 percentage in 2000, respectively.
The following bar chart compares the
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percentage
of individuals who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
according to five age groups
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 17 and 64".
between 17 to 64
years
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old
in the United States between 1850 and 2000.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the
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percentage
of
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people
tending to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
was increasing in mentioned period of time. While
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adults
between 55-64 years
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old
were ranked
as the highest
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percentage
among the others,
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people
under 27
constantly
measured the least.

Although in 1850
Did you mean "now" (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
no
under 37 years
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old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
alone, in 1900 27 to 36 years
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old
individuals
gradually
rose, with approximately 2%. At the same time, adult between 37 and 54
equally
obtained 2
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percentage
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in 1900
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people
from 27 to 36 years
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old
overtook the younger
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adults
. In the
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year
1950 the
first
group up 17 to 26 years
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old
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adults
, with
merely
2%
were found
, whereas it
drastically
grew doubled by the
next
50 years.

Surprisingly
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people
who were
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 37 and 64".
between 37 to 64
years
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old
share the same
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percentage
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
1950, While the
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percentage
of
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people
between 47-54 and 55-64 climb to their peaks by 3 and 9
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percentage
in 1950, and 13 and 17
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
in 2000,
respectively
.

IELTS academic the bar chart below shows the percentage of people living alone by 5 different age group in the US between 1850 and 2000.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
200 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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