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The bar chart below shows information about the amount of billion kWh electricity produced and consumed in 2014 in the top ten countries.

The bar chart below shows information about the amount of billion kWh electricity produced and consumed in 2014 in the top ten countries. J3ELj
The bar chart below shows information about the amount of billion kWh electricity produced and consumed in 2014 in the top ten countries. In particular, it can be seen that the electricity consumption and production in China accounted for a largest number of billion kWh. By contrast, Korea produced and used electricity was the least of total statistics given. In 2014, the amount of electricity produced and consumed in China hit the highest point, as follows: 5. 938 and 5. 322 billion respectively. Meanwhile, these figures for the United States still stayed higher than other countries, except for China, which made up 4. 099 billion for production and 3. 866 billion for consumption. There are 1. 057 billion of produced electricity and 1. 038 billion of used electricity in Russia, considerably low compared to China and the US. In Japan, the energy power created and used spent more than 936. 2 and 856. 7 billion kWh on this as opposed to India, at 871 for manufacturing and 698. 8 for consuming. Addtionally, Canada and France are almost equally low, the electricity consumption and production in Canada stood at 449. 9 and 618. 9 billion, whereas these statistics for the French were 462. 9 and 561. 2 billion. In terms of Brazil and Germany, their electricity generations ranged from 530. 7 to 526. 6 billion while their usages ranged from 455. 8 to 582. 5 billion kWh. Finally, Korea was the lowest of the top ten countries in comparison, only produced and consumed above 500, at 485. 1 and 449. 5 billion kWh respectively.
The bar chart below
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shows
information about the amount of
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billion
kWh
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electricity
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produced
and consumed in 2014 in the top ten countries.

In particular
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the
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electricity
consumption and production in China accounted for
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
largest number of
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billion
kWh. By contrast, Korea
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produced
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
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electricity
was the least of total statistics
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
.

In 2014, the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electricity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
produced
and consumed in China hit the highest point, as follows: 5. 938 and 5. 322
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
respectively
. Meanwhile, these figures for the United States
still
stayed higher than other countries,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
except for
China, which made up 4. 099
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billion
for production and 3. 866
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billion
for consumption. There are 1. 057
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billion
of
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produced
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electricity
and 1. 038
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billion
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
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electricity
in Russia,
considerably
low compared to China and the US.

In Japan, the energy power created and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
spent more than 936. 2 and 856. 7
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billion
kWh on this as opposed to India, at 871 for manufacturing and 698. 8 for consuming.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Addtionally
, Canada and France are almost
equally
low, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electricity
consumption and production in Canada stood at 449. 9 and 618. 9
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billion
, whereas these statistics for the French were 462. 9 and 561. 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
. In terms of Brazil and Germany, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electricity
generations ranged from 530. 7 to 526. 6
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billion
while their usages ranged from 455. 8 to 582. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
kWh.
Finally
, Korea was the lowest of the top ten countries
in comparison
,
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only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
produced
and consumed above 500, at 485. 1 and 449. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
kWh
respectively
.

IELTS academic The bar chart below shows information about the amount of billion kWh electricity produced and consumed in 2014 in the top ten countries.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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Lexical Resource: 5.5
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Grammatical Range: 6.5
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Task Achievement: 5.5
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    Present relevant ideas
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