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task 1 mylty graphs acadimic

task 1 mylty graphs acadimic p57O0
These charts below provides information in regard to the country of birth of people living in Australia and where people born in these countries live. Overall, it can be seen that the majority of people born in New Zealand in addition that a large percentage of babies were born in cities. According to what is shown, it can be noticed that New Zealand is on top of the stats with 73% then Netherlands came second with 14% the next is United Kingdom with 7%. Lastly China and others countries are 3%. With regards to where people born in these countries live, it can be seen that all of the countries in the table have in common that majority of people were born in the cites China is the highest with 99% then Netherlands is second with 90%, after that the United Kingdom come with 89%. Finally New Zealand is the lowest country with 80%.
These charts below provides information in regard to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
of birth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in Australia and where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
born in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.

Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
born in New Zealand
in addition
that a large percentage of babies
were born
in cities.

According to what
is shown
, it can
be noticed
that New Zealand is on top of the stats with 73% then Netherlands came second with 14% the
next
is United
Kingdom with 7%.
Lastly
China
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are 3%.

Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
With regards to
where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
born in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that
Consider using "all the".
all of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in the table have in common that majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were born
in the cites China is the highest with 99% then Netherlands is second with 90%, after that the United Kingdom
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
with 89%.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Finally
New Zealand is the lowest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
with 80%.
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IELTS academic task 1 mylty graphs acadimic

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
154 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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