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Tabular chart depicts the information about vacancy held by women in parliament and management in 2000

Tabular chart depicts the information about vacancy held by women in parliament and management in 2000 WmmVD
The given tabular chart represents the information about the vacancies held by feminine in parliament and in legislative sector in different nations during 2000. As an overview, it is noticeable that the highest proportion of women were working in government sector in Canada. Rome had biggest ratio of the ladies who work in management sector in the given year. Moving into details, the majority of the women who employees in government body which were recorded at 54% in Canada. Egypt was ranked second with fifty two percent ladies which were working in law enforcement agencies. Rome was least nation where merely 10% feminine who hired in administration sector. Ukraine and Italy's women who worked in government sector were 23% and 40% respectively. Turning to the details, the biggest proportion of ladies who employ in management sector was more than half. Furthermore, Ukraine stood at second position, there was 40% women working in management body. Canada and Egypt feminine who hiring in management was similar with 36% respectively. Italy's women workers were least as compared to the others with 25%.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
tabular chart represents the information about the vacancies held by feminine in parliament and in legislative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
nations during 2000. As an overview, it is noticeable that the highest proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
were working in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
in Canada. Rome had
A determiner is probably missing here: "the biggest".
biggest
ratio of the ladies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
work in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
management
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
year. Moving into
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, the majority of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
employees in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
body which
were recorded
at 54% in Canada. Egypt
was ranked
second with
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
fifty two
percent ladies which were working in law enforcement agencies. Rome was
A determiner is probably missing here: "the least".
least
nation where
merely
10% feminine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
hired in administration
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
. Ukraine and Italy's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
worked in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
were 23% and 40%
respectively
. Turning to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, the biggest proportion of ladies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
employ in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
management
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
was more than half.
Furthermore
, Ukraine stood at second position, there was 40%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
working in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
management
body. Canada and Egypt feminine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
hiring in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
management
was similar with 36%
respectively
. Italy's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
workers were least as compared to the others with 25%.
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IELTS academic Tabular chart depicts the information about vacancy held by women in parliament and management in 2000

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
179 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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