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Student joining North West University

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The charts illustrates the proportion of students joining North West University by faculty and also the number of international students in the Arts faculty. Overall, arts, computing and science are the major three faculties of the University, together constituting over 70% of the entire student population of the University, wheresas medicine and law faculties comprises the least number of students. It is also found that students from five countries are enrolled in the Arts faculty, among which most of them were from South America. With respect to the faculties, 23% of students are enrolled in the arts division, making it the most popular faculty in the University. The computing and science division follows, with 22% and 21% respectively. Furthermore, the business faculty consists of 14% of students. Other faculties such as engineering, medicine and law are the least popular divisions with less than 10% students each. Regarding the international students, there are 112 students from five different countries enrolled in the Arts faculty, mostly from South America (79 students) and European countries (21). Other countries include Australia (4 students) and those from Africa and Asia with 2 and 6 students respectively.
The charts
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illustrates
the proportion of
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students
joining North West
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University
by faculty and
also
the number of international
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students
in the
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Arts
faculty.

Overall
,
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arts
, computing and science are the major three faculties of the
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University
, together constituting over 70% of the entire
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student
population of the
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University
,
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wheresas
medicine and law faculties comprises the least number of
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students
. It is
also
found that
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students
from five
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countries
are enrolled
in the
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Arts
faculty, among which most of them were from South America.

With respect to the faculties, 23% of
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students
are enrolled
in the
Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean "arts'" or "art's"?
arts
division, making it the most popular faculty in the
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University
. The computing and science division follows, with 22% and 21%
respectively
.
Furthermore
, the business faculty consists of 14% of
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students
. Other faculties such as engineering, medicine and law are the least popular divisions with less than 10%
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students
each.

Regarding the international
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students
, there are 112
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students
from five
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different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
enrolled in the
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Arts
faculty,
mostly
from South America (79
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students)
and European
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countries
(21). Other
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countries
include Australia (4
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students)
and those from Africa and Asia with 2 and 6
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students
respectively
.
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IELTS academic Student joining North West University

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
191 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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