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Some people say that countries should host international sports events while other believe hosting sports events has more problem than benefits.Discuss the advantages and disadvantages?

Some people say that countries should host international sports events while other believe hosting sports events has more problem than benefits. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages? 0aGMQ
It is argued by a few individuals that countries organize global events, while others hold opposite views. Although that event poses the economic burden on serval developing and undeveloped nations, I believe that it bolsters the economy of the country. To begin with, the main demerit of global programs puts on the burden on the economic conditions by taking a hefty amounts of loans or funds from the foreign country as result it creates a problem of repayment funds too long, and that amount of loan only spent on global events rather than other significant sectors in education, medical and agriculture sector. Furthermore, the international sports programs as attracts the people in the specific area where makes regain overcrowded as well as arises the chances of serval environmental issues like air pollutions. For Example, an article was published by 'Times of India' which revealed that Canada took a big loan from the world bank for international programs but the nation suffered from heavy interest and long-term liability. On the flip side, the global sports events attract the tourist from the distinct of nations in which the tourist spend more money for a lot of activities as result, it enhances the growth of the country's economy and also a huge amount of investment done by the large companies who are looking for their future profits. In addition to this, the global programs also bring the name and fame of the country as well as people know about the distinct types of cultural values of foreign countries. For instance, a survey was conducted by 'The Tokyo Games' which revealed that 69 % of tourists came to the country for 'Tokyo Games 2020' as result sports events boosted the economic growth of the nation by international sports events. To conclude, while putting the burden on serval developing and underdeveloped nation's economies, I strongly think that sports events increase the growth of the economic condition of the country.
It
is argued
by a few individuals that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
organize
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
, while others hold opposite views. Although that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
poses the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
burden on
Possible spelling mistake found.
serval
developing and undeveloped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
, I believe that it bolsters the economy of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the main demerit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
puts on the burden on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
conditions by taking a hefty
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "amount"?
amounts
of loans or funds from the foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
as result it creates a problem of repayment funds too long, and that amount of loan
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
spent on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
rather
than other significant sectors in education, medical and agriculture sector.
Furthermore
, the international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
as attracts the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the specific area where
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
regain overcrowded
as well
as arises the chances of
Possible spelling mistake found.
serval
environmental issues like air pollutions.
For Example
, an article
was published
by 'Times of India' which revealed that Canada took a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
loan from the
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
world bank
for international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
suffered from heavy interest and long-term liability. On the flip side, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
attract the tourist from
The phrase 'the distinct of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'the' and 'of'.
the distinct of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
in which the tourist spend more money for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
activities as result, it enhances the growth of the country's economy and
also
a huge amount of investment done by the large
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
who are looking for their future profits.
In addition
to this, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
also
bring the name and fame of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
as well
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
know about the distinct types of cultural values of foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
For instance
, a survey
was conducted
by 'The Tokyo Games' which revealed that 69 % of tourists came to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
for 'Tokyo Games 2020' as result
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
boosted the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
growth of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
by international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
.
To conclude
, while putting the burden on
Possible spelling mistake found.
serval
developing and underdeveloped nation's economies, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
increase the growth of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
condition of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
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IELTS academic Some people say that countries should host international sports events while other believe hosting sports events has more problem than benefits. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages?

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
324 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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Lexical Resource: 5.0
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Grammatical Range: 6.5
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Task Achievement: 5.0
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    Present relevant ideas
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