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Saidahror2000ieltswriting

Saidahror2000ieltswriting J3JVw
The given line graph depicts data on utilizing water around the world while table compares the proportion of water than consumed in two countries namely, Brazil and Congo Overall there was an increase in the amount of water usage of domestic use, industrial use, and agricultural which was reached a highest improvement between 1900 and 2000 whereas Brazil’s consumption of water was far more than Congo. Regards as the graph, in 1900, there were no numbers in the portion of home utilizing and manufacturing usage while agriculture stood at around 500 km3, in the following 5 decades, agriculture climbed slightly by about 500 km3 while domestic and industrial ones showed a growth very slightly, with about 200 against 300 km3. Till the end of the given period, agriculture improved dramatically and reached over 3000 km 3 which was the highest point in all the supplied time whereas in 2000, industrial and house sectors showed approximately just over 1000 and 400 km3 in turn. By contrast, when it comes to water consumption of countries, Brazil witnessed 176 million compared to Congo, with 5, 2 million. According to the other sides, Brazil is the leader with 26, 500 km2 and 359 km2 compared with Congo, at 10 km and 8 m2 respectively.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
line graph depicts data on utilizing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
around the world while table compares the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
than consumed in two countries
namely
, Brazil and Congo

Overall
there was an increase in the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
usage of domestic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
, industrial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
, and agricultural which
was reached
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
highest improvement between 1900 and 2000 whereas Brazil’s consumption of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
was far more than Congo.

Regards as the graph, in 1900, there were no numbers in the portion of home utilizing and manufacturing usage while agriculture stood at around 500 km3, in the following 5 decades, agriculture climbed
slightly
by about 500 km3 while domestic and industrial ones
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a growth
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
slightly
, with about 200 against 300 km3. Till the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period, agriculture
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
dramatically
and reached over 3000 km 3 which was the highest point in all the supplied time whereas in 2000, industrial and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
sectors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
approximately
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over 1000 and 400 km3 in turn.

By contrast, when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
consumption of countries, Brazil witnessed 176 million compared to Congo, with 5, 2 million. According to the other sides, Brazil is the leader with 26, 500 km2 and 359 km2 compared with Congo, at 10 km and 8 m2
respectively
.
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IELTS academic Saidahror2000ieltswriting

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
210 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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