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Report for imprisonment in country

Report for imprisonment in country GOMm
The bar chart below compares the number of prisoners (in thousand)caught in five different countries (Great Britain, Australia, New Zealand, United States, Canada) over the years 1930 to 1980. It is clear that the numbers of imprisonment in the USA and Canada are slightly higher over the years compared to the rest of the countries. On the other hand, the figures for Great Britain have been considerably low. At the same time, it is moderate in Australia and New Zealand. In the year between 1930 and 1950, the countries experiencing a significant amount of imprisonments were America and Canada, which was around 100 -150 thousand. In 1930 New Zealand imprisonment activity was 100 thousand, which was the same as in America; after that, it saw a downfall by almost half in the next two decades. Great Britain, on the contrary, figures of Britain were between 20-40 thousand and were subsequently low than other five countries. After the mid-1900s, the prisoners' rates rose in America and Great Britain, where Canada saw a fall by 20-40 thousand. Although the figures kept slightly fluctuating between 50 -60 thousand for Australia, they were relatively stable for New Zealand
The bar chart below compares the number of prisoners (in
Use "a thousand" or use a number before 'thousand'.
thousand
)caught in five
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
(Great
Britain, Australia, New Zealand, United States, Canada) over the years 1930 to 1980.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the numbers of imprisonment in the USA and Canada are
slightly
higher over the years

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
compared
to the rest of the countries.
On the other hand
, the figures for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Great
Britain have
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
been


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
considerably
low. At the same time, it is moderate in Australia and New Zealand.

In the year between 1930 and 1950, the countries experiencing a significant amount of

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
imprisonments
were America and Canada, which was around 100 -150 thousand. In 1930
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
New


The genitive is possibly missing.
Zealand imprisonment
activity was 100 thousand, which was the same as in America; after that, it

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
saw
a downfall by almost half in the
next
two decades.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Great
Britain,
on the contrary
, figures
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
of


Britain were between 20-40 thousand and were
subsequently
Use "lower" to make a comparison with this adjective.
low
than other five countries.

After the mid-1900s, the prisoners' rates rose in America and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Great
Britain, where Canada
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a fall

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
by
20-40 thousand. Although the figures
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
slightly
fluctuating between 50 -60 thousand
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
for


Australia, they were
relatively
stable for New Zealand

IELTS academic Report for imprisonment in country

Academic
  American English
13 paragraphs
193 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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