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Refrigerator sales of company ABC

Refrigerator sales of company ABC DNenj
The bar graph elucidates the information about ABC organisation sold fridge from 2001 to 2004. All in all, the highest sold electronic appliances in 2004, nonetheless, lowest earnings in 2001. It is evident from the graph that in the year 2004, company had a profit of nearly 120 million dollars from 165ltr. model whilst it lessened with around 110 million dollars in 2003 along with 300ltr. model fridge got similar figure. Moreover, double door model's selling were inclined to more than 100 million dollars in 2004, on the other side, it had declined by approximately 20 millions dollars. 300ltr. refrigerator gained neigh 100 millions dollars in 2004.
The bar graph elucidates the information about ABC
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
sold fridge from 2001 to 2004. All in all, the highest sold electronic appliances in 2004, nonetheless,
A determiner is probably missing here: "the lowest".
lowest
earnings in 2001. It is evident from the graph that in the year 2004,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
had a profit of
nearly
120
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
from 165ltr.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
model
whilst it lessened with around 110
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in 2003 along with 300ltr.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
model
fridge
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
similar figure.
Moreover
, double door model's selling
were inclined
to more than 100
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in 2004, on the other side, it had declined by approximately 20
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
. 300ltr.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
refrigerator
gained neigh 100
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in 2004.

IELTS academic Refrigerator sales of company ABC

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
107 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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