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Reasons for moving to capitals

Reasons for moving to capitals MBB9q

The chart clearly shows that there are four major reasons which can be causes of relocating to capitals Firstly you can see the empolyment and job-oriented bases of these movings and its increasing between 2000-2010 is apparent however in next period faces with a slight decrease In second stage we are observing the category of studying which has been constantly growing during this fifteen years and except a period of 2005-2010 It's growth is notably rapid Thirdly we can mention two different group of causes which are family-friends and advanture; however they have slightly smiler raising rate but family-friends category is apparently more influential for this kind of migration Overall; despite holding four distinguished category of causes for changing the habitat to capitals we can observe that employment and study are absolutely more determinative.

The chart clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :demonstratesportraysindicatesdisplays
shows
 that there are four major reasons which can be causes of relocating to capitals

Firstly
 you can This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :witness
see
 the Possible spelling mistake found.employment
empolyment
 and job-oriented bases of these Possible spelling mistake found.moving
movings
 and its increasing between 2000-2010 is apparent however
 in next
 period faces with a slight decrease

In second stage we are observing the category of studying which has been constantly
 growing during this fifteen years and except a period of 2005-2010

Did you mean "Its"?Its
It's
 growth is notably
 rapid

Thirdly
 we can mention two This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:various
different
Possible agreement error. The noun 'group' seems to be countable, so consider using: "groups".groups
group
 of causes which are family-friends and Possible spelling mistake found.adventure
advanture
; however
 they have slightly
Possible spelling mistake found.smilesmilessmiledsmileymilers miler
smiler
 raising rate This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:on the contrary
but
 family-friends category is apparently
 more influential for this kind of migration

Overall
; despite holding four distinguished Possible agreement error. The noun 'category' seems to be countable, so consider using: "categories".categories
category
 of causes for changing the habitat to capitals we can observe that employment and study are absolutely
 more Possible spelling mistake found.determinationdeterminate
determinative
. 

IELTS academic Reasons for moving to capitals

Academic

American English

6 paragraphs

134 words

This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1

4.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
?
One main idea per paragraph
?
Include an introduction and conclusion
?
Support main points with an explanation and then an example
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
?
Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

Lexical Resource: 6.0

Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
Check your writing for errors

Task Achievement: 5.0

Answer all parts of the question
?
Present relevant ideas
Fully explain these ideas
?
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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