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population in England donating to charity by different ages for 2 years, 1990, and 2010.

population in England donating to charity by different ages for 2 years, 1990, and 2010. EpW53
The chart examines the percentage of population in England donating to charity by different ages for 2 years, 1990, and 2010. Overall, there are 5 range of ages, 18 to 65 years old, the gap is 7 years in first 2 range and last 2 range the gap is 14 years. According to the chart, in 1990, 3 out of 5 range of ages giving money much more than in 2010, just 51-65, and lower than 65 years old that are vary. Obviously, humans in 90's donated much more than in second millennium. Especially, 18 to 25 years old, in 1990 17%, but only 7 % in 2010. 26 to 35 also has the difference of percent by approximately 10%. 36 to 50, 1990 donated by 42% which is more than in 2010. In contrast, 51 to more than 65 years, the amount of money gives in 1990 is less than in 2010. However, in 20 decade still higher than 1990, but just in 2 range, 61 to 65amd more than 65 years old. In range 51 to 65, the number is more than by around 3%, and in range more than 65 years, 2010 more than 1990 with 35% more than just 2% which mean 1990 got 33%.
The chart examines the percentage of population in England donating to charity by
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different
ages for 2 years, 1990, and 2010.

Overall
, there are 5
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range
of ages, 18 to 65 years
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old
, the gap is 7 years in
first
2
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range
and last 2
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range
the gap is 14 years. According to the chart, in 1990, 3 out of 5
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range
of ages giving money much more than in 2010,
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just
51-65, and lower than 65 years
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old
that are
Consider using a past participle here: "varied".
vary
.

Obviously
, humans in
Apostrophes aren't needed for decades: "90s".
90's
donated much more than in second millennium.
Especially
, 18 to 25 years
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old
, in 1990 17%,
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but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
7 % in 2010. 26 to 35
also
has the difference of percent by approximately 10%. 36 to 50, 1990 donated by 42% which is more than in 2010.
In contrast
, 51 to more than 65 years, the amount of money gives in 1990 is less than in 2010.

However
, in 20 decade
still
higher than 1990,
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but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
in 2
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range
, 61 to 65amd more than 65 years
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old
. In
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range
51 to 65, the number is more than by around 3%, and in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
range
more than 65 years, 2010 more than 1990 with 35% more than
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just
2% which mean 1990
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
33%.
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IELTS academic population in England donating to charity by different ages for 2 years, 1990, and 2010.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
209 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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