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Physical activities plays an important role in every individual life what are the advantage and disadvantages of doing exercise

Physical activities plays an important role in every individual life what are the advantage and disadvantages of doing exercise 8dEbk
People can be well and trick by doing regular exercise physical activities plays an important role in every individual life the pros overweigh the cons both advantages and disadvantages are highlighted in upcoming paragraph. Nowadays many diseases are spreading gradually and everyone wants to be well and fit and free from every diseases there are several positives of doing physical activities to start with if people will do exercise yoga and other physical activities they can be free from any type of disease such as back pain and shoulders knees joint pain not only this most of the old people face problems like asthma osteoporosis high potential and they do not want to take excessive medicines for this problems because medicines may be harmful for other parts of the body so it will be beneficial for every senior citizens and doing exercise and yoga be beneficial for them. On the other side many people have a hectic schedule and they are very busy with their work they do not want to do misuse of their free time so they do not want to do such physical activities because it is a wastage of a time for them and if they will add these activities in their daily hectic schedule then they have to change their daily routine and time table also older people should do these physical activities for a limited time and they also should do those exercise in which they are comfortable because in the age of 60 most of the people do not have enough power all strength in their body so if they will do hard physical activities such as teaching for a long time it may cause a problem in their body and it will increase their body pain. Conclusion doing physical activities will be beneficial for many people and it has several advantages but some time this may cause problems to some person.
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People
can be well and trick by
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doing
regular
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exercise
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physical
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activities
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in every individual life the pros
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overweigh
the cons both advantages and disadvantages
are highlighted
in upcoming paragraph.

Nowadays
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many
diseases are spreading
gradually
and everyone
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wants
to be well and fit and free from every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "disease"?
diseases
there are several positives of
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doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
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activities
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with if
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people
will do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
yoga and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
they can be free from any type of disease such as back pain and shoulders knees joint pain not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
this most of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
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people
face
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problems
like asthma osteoporosis high
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
potential and
they do not
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want
to take excessive medicines for
Did you mean "these"?
this
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problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
medicines may be harmful for other parts of the
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body
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it will be beneficial for every senior citizens and
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doing
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exercise
and yoga be beneficial for them. On the other side
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
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people
have a hectic
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
schedule and
they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
busy with their work they do not
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want
to do misuse of their free
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time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they do not
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want
to do such
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physical
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activities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is a wastage of a
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time
for them and if they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
these
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activities
in their daily hectic schedule then they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their daily routine and
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time
table
also
older
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people
should do these
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physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
for a limited
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
time and
they
also
should do those
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exercise
in which they are comfortable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
in the age of 60 most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
power all strength in their
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body
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
if they will do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
such as teaching for a long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
it may cause a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
and it will increase their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
pain. Conclusion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
will be beneficial for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and it has several advantages
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
this may cause
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
person.
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IELTS academic Physical activities plays an important role in every individual life what are the advantage and disadvantages of doing exercise

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
319 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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