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percentage of tourists to scotland

percentage of tourists to scotland PkDVJ
The line graph compares the percentage of tourists to Scotland who visited Edinburgh atractions between 1980 and 2010. There was a fluctuation in the percentage of tourists in four different places. We can see that in 1980 and in 2010, the favourite attraction were the castle and the festival. In 1980, the least popular place was the zoo while in 2010 this changed and the aquarium was the least popular. During the 1980s and 1995s, there was a substantial rise in visitors to the castle from about 23% to nearly 45% and the figures declined gradually to 30% in 2010. The trend for the aquarium was similar to the castle. Visitors went up dramatically from 20% to 35% between 1980 and 1985 and then steadily dropped to under 10% over the next twenty-five years. Beside, the proportion of tourists who visited the festival remained stable at about 25% from 1980 to 2010. Visitors to the zoo also fluctuated between 1980 and 2000 and then increased sharply from 10% to 20% from 2000 to 2010.
The line graph compares the percentage of tourists to Scotland who visited Edinburgh
Possible spelling mistake found.
atractions
between 1980 and 2010.

There was a fluctuation in the percentage of tourists in four
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places. We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that in 1980 and in 2010, the
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
attraction were the castle and the festival. In 1980, the least popular place was the zoo while in 2010 this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
and the aquarium was the least popular.

During the 1980s and 1995s, there was a substantial rise in visitors to the castle from about 23% to
nearly
45% and the figures declined
gradually
to 30% in 2010. The trend for the aquarium was similar to the castle. Visitors went up
dramatically
from 20% to 35% between 1980 and 1985 and then
steadily
dropped to under 10% over the
next
twenty-five years.

Beside, the proportion of tourists who visited the festival remained stable at about 25% from 1980 to 2010. Visitors to the zoo
also
fluctuated between 1980 and 2000 and then increased
sharply
from 10% to 20% from 2000 to 2010.

IELTS academic percentage of tourists to scotland

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
174 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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