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percentage of households in owned and rented accommodation

percentage of households in owned and rented accommodation do9GP
The bar graph depicts the information about citizen of England living in rented and owned accommodation between the year 1981 and 2011. To embark with, The trend for living in owned accommodation increase gradually. During the initial year almost 78% lives in rent, whereas, only one fourth of the population live in owned house. However, between the year 1931 and 1953 percentage remain constant for both rent and owned house, around 67% and 33% respectively. In the year 1971 both the categories share an equal percentage that is 50% Moreover, the upward trend for the owned house have been started. In 1961, 60% people purchased their own house, while 40% in rented. In the next 4 decade, citizens; living in owned house increased from 60% to almost 70% and rented house declined to 35% respectively Overall it can be observed that there is an inverse trend in people accommodation during the initial year rented house were more but it decrease gradually and now owned house are more in number.
The bar graph depicts the information about citizen of England living in rented and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owned
accommodation between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1981 and 2011.

To embark with, The trend for living in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owned
accommodation increase
gradually
. During the initial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
almost 78%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in rent, whereas,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one fourth of the population
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
.
However
, between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1931 and 1953 percentage remain constant for both rent and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
, around 67% and 33%
respectively
. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1971 both the categories share an equal percentage
that is
50%

Moreover
, the upward trend for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
have been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
. In 1961, 60%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
, while 40% in rented.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
the
next
4 decade, citizens; living in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
increased from 60% to almost 70% and rented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
declined to 35%
respectively


Overall
it can
be observed
that there is an inverse trend in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
accommodation during the initial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
rented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
were more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it decrease
gradually
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
are more in number.

IELTS academic percentage of households in owned and rented accommodation

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
169 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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