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Ownership of electric appliances line chart

Ownership of electric appliances line chart 06ebl
The propounded line graph reveals the Information about the variations in the ownership of electric gadgets and amount of time devoted during the house chores in homes. The one graph is rendered in percentage and the other is in number of hours per week from the year 1920 and 2019. The overall analysis of the data depicts that the proportion of refrigerator and vacuum cleaner were just rising but the ratio of washing machine was firstly increased and during the half of the century it slowly began to decline, however, after that it again soared. At a fleeting glance, in the year 1920 the rate of the house tasks done with the help of vacuum cleaner was 30%. Refrigerator were used very less just 1%to 2; and the washing machines were used more as 40%in comparison to the other two gadgets. After that, by the period of 2 decades, the use of all the items upsurged. With the incline in the use, individuals of a nation began to purchase more. The figure of vacuum cleaner and washing clothess grown with same difference such as 30%to 50% and 40%to 60%as well as the raguo7of refrigerator peaked dramatically to 55%i the middle of washing machine and vacuum. Moreover, the proportion of vacuum cleaner was continuously climbing upward with equal distinction of 70%in 1960 and the 90%in 1980 and remain constant till 2019. But, Ithe rate of washing machine increased steeply to 70%and refrigerator rocketed to 90%upto 1960. After that, it under tons near about 65% and refrigerator reached at 100%, which remain similar to the year 2019. However, the washing machine then again reached to 70% and then 75%. On further scrutinizing, the number of hours of household per week according to per household was 50 hours in 1920 and the it goes on downsurging till 2019 from 50 hours in 1960 and after that 15 hours in 1980 and 2000. Finally, it reached at 10 hours up to the year 2019.
The propounded line graph reveals the Information about the variations in the ownership of electric gadgets and amount of time devoted during the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
chores in homes. The one graph
is rendered
in percentage and the other is in number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
per week from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1920 and 2019.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
overall
analysis of the data depicts that the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refrigerator
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vacuum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cleaner
were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
rising
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the ratio of washing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
was
firstly
increased and during the half of the century it
slowly
began to decline,
however
, after that it again soared. At a fleeting glance, in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1920 the rate of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
tasks done with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vacuum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cleaner
was 30%.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Refrigerator
were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
less
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
1%to 2; and the washing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
more
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
as
40%
in comparison
to the other two gadgets. After that, by the period of 2 decades, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of all the items upsurged. With the incline in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
, individuals of a nation began to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
more. The figure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vacuum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cleaner
and washing
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "clothes", the plural form of the noun 'clothes'?
clothess
grown with same difference such as 30%to 50% and 40%to 60%
as well
as the raguo7of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refrigerator
peaked
dramatically
to 55%i the middle of washing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vacuum
.
Moreover
, the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vacuum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cleaner
was
continuously
climbing upward with equal distinction of 70%in 1960 and the 90%in 1980 and remain constant till 2019.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ithe
rate of washing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
increased
steeply
to 70%and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refrigerator
rocketed to 90%upto 1960. After that,
It seems that the possessive pronoun "its" fits better in this context. Please verify.
it
under tons near about 65% and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refrigerator
reached at 100%, which remain similar to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2019.
However
, the washing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
then again reached to 70% and then 75%.

On
further
scrutinizing, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
of household per week according to per household was 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
in 1920 and
Possible typo. Did you mean "the" or "it"?
the it
goes on
Possible spelling mistake found.
downsurging
till 2019 from 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
in 1960 and after that 15
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
in 1980 and 2000.
Finally
, it reached at 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
up to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2019.
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IELTS academic Ownership of electric appliances line chart

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
330 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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