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Mexico on International flights

Mexico on International flights m9wVr
The bar chart compares the total of passengers entering Mexico on International flights in a six years of period, from 2005 to 2010. Generally speaking, there is a huge contrast between the four territories, namely Canada, USA, Europe as well as South America. The most statistics of passengers entered from the USA whilst the lowest number of voyagers were reported from South America overall the years compared. The USA seemed to have been increasing in numbers. Finally it reached its highest in the year 2007, until a sudden drop, which can be observed on the chart between 2008 and 2009. Europe also displayed a progressive growth, until the exact period the USA experienced a slump. Compared to Europe and the USA through the years Canada has shown a gradual growth. Thus, Canada had out-reached Europe in the last two years displayed on the chart. Until 2010 South America had the lowest sum in each term showing minimal growth, and consistency.
The bar chart compares the total of passengers entering Mexico on International flights in a six years of period, from 2005 to 2010.

Generally
speaking, there is a huge contrast between the four territories,
namely
Canada, USA, Europe
as well
as South America. The most statistics of passengers entered from the USA whilst the lowest number of voyagers
were reported
from South America
overall
the years compared.

The USA seemed to have been increasing in numbers.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Finally
it reached its highest in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2007, until a sudden drop, which can
be observed
on the chart between 2008 and 2009. Europe
also
displayed a progressive growth, until the exact period the USA experienced a slump.

Compared to Europe and the USA through the years Canada has shown a gradual growth.
Thus
, Canada had out-reached Europe in the last two years displayed on the chart.

Until 2010 South America had the lowest sum in each term showing minimal growth, and consistency.
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IELTS academic Mexico on International flights

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
160 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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