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Map of road to a city hospital

Map of road to a city hospital PgDGg
The given maps illustrate the road which leads to a city hospital in two different years in 2007 and 2010. Overall, it is immediately apparent that the road access to City Hospital underwent significant changes during the period. In 2007, there was a ring road which surrounded the City hospital and Hospital road which can connect City road from south direction to ring road. The parking space, in the west and east sides of Hospital road, was common for both public and Hospital staff and a bus stop also can be seen on the East side of the hospital. In 2010, the road network to City Hospital has improved with some new facilities. The bus stop disappeared and a new bus station can be seen in the south west direction of the hospital which was a part of parking place previously determined the place of all the common car park changed into staff ka per a new large parking area was built-in in the east side of the hospital for the public in addition to roundabout were introduced in front of the hospital towards south and direction to reduce the traffic condition.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
maps illustrate the
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road
which leads to a city
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
in two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
years in 2007 and 2010.

Overall
, it is immediately apparent that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
access to City
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
underwent significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
during the period.

In 2007, there was a ring
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road
which surrounded the City
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
which can connect City
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
from south direction to ring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
. The parking space, in the west and east sides of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
, was common for both public and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
staff and a bus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
also
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
on the East side of the hospital.

In 2010, the
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road
network to City
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
new facilities. The bus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
disappeared and a new bus station can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
south west
direction of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
which was a part of parking place previously determined the place of all the common car park
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
into staff
Possible spelling mistake found.
ka
per a new large parking area
was built
-in in the east side of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
for the public
in addition
to roundabout
were introduced
in front of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
towards south and direction to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the traffic condition.
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IELTS academic Map of road to a city hospital

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
192 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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