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Manufacturing process for sugar cane

Manufacturing process for sugar cane 5B8aD
The diagram provides step by step formation of sugar from sugarcane. Sugarcane goes through several processes such as growing, harvesting, crushing, purifying juice, heating, centrifugal and finally drying and cooling. Firstly, sugarcane took nearly 12 to 18 months for it's complete growth. Then, it is harvested with the tractor or by man with sharp edge tool from its bottom part. Secondly, crushing of sugar canes takes place in juice crusher where juice is collected in a bowl or structure like it. Afterward juice is purified by limestone filter. Also, purified juice is heated in huge vessel where juice becomes syrup by means of evaporator process. To separate sugar crystals from syrup it undergoes centrifugal process. Finally, drying and cooling of sugar crystals takes place in container to formed sugar.
The diagram provides step by step formation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
from sugarcane.

Sugarcane goes through several processes such as growing, harvesting, crushing, purifying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
juice
, heating, centrifugal and
finally
drying and cooling.

Firstly
, sugarcane took
nearly
12 to 18 months for it's complete growth. Then, it
is harvested
with the tractor or by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
with sharp edge tool from its bottom part.

Secondly
, crushing of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
canes takes place in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
juice
crusher where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
juice
is collected
in a bowl or structure like it. Afterward
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
juice
is purified
by limestone filter.

Also
, purified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
juice
is heated
in huge vessel where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
juice
becomes syrup by means of evaporator process. To separate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
crystals from syrup it undergoes centrifugal process.
Finally
, drying and cooling of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
crystals takes place in container to formed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
.
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IELTS academic Manufacturing process for sugar cane

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
129 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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