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Learning English language vs local languages

Learning English language vs local languages NMXnj
Learning English is important, but learning local languages is just as important. For example, English is a global language that is used by many countries and is very important in communication throughout business or studies of any type, it has become a standard in a lot universities, schools, and businesses around the world to have knowledge of English language and is a requirement for admissions or contracts and so on. Even in countries where English is not the first language, like Sudan; my home country, it is very normal for people to communicate with expats and visitors through English in known and common words, not necessarily forming a complete sentence, but just enough to understand each other, therefore making english one of the most common languages in the world. But where does that put local languages? to me, the world becoming one through the internet and English along with some other global languages, changes nothing regarding the importance of keeping local languages alive, they are a part of what keeps every region unique! Our children need to learn them to know where we come from and feel related to their origins. It is every country's responsibility to insure that schools integrate their local language as part of the curriculum, as well as integrating local spoken tongues in TV shows and theaters as means of entertainment. Preserving historic books at the museums and arranging school visits to educate the children about the sources of their culture and language, as well as arranging tours for visitors. There is no doubt about the importance of the English language as a part of our new world, albeit, it doesn't take away any of the significance of our beloved local tongue, and there should never be a choice between learning both, in fact they should go hand in hand helping us unite as one with English and maintain our uniqueness and individuality with our local spoken tongues!
Learning English is
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important
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
learning
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local
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languages
is
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just
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.

For example
, English is a global
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language
that is
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used
by
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many
countries and is
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very
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important
in communication throughout business or studies of any type, it has become a standard in
If you mean a great quantity, use "a lot of universities"?
a lot universities
, schools, and businesses around the world to have knowledge of English
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
and is a requirement for admissions or contracts and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.

Even in countries where English is not the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
, like Sudan; my home country, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
normal for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to communicate with expats and visitors through English in known and common words, not
necessarily
forming a complete sentence,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to understand each other,
therefore
making
Possible spelling mistake found.
english
one of the most common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
in the world.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
where does that put
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
?
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
to
me, the world becoming one through the internet and English along with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
nothing regarding the importance of keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
alive, they are a part of what
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
every region unique! Our children need to learn them to know where we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from and feel related to their origins.

It is every country's responsibility to
Did you mean "ensure" (=make sure)? 'Insure' means 'pay money to insurance company'.
insure
that schools integrate their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
as part of the curriculum,
as well
as integrating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
spoken

tongues in TV
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
and theaters as means of entertainment. Preserving historic books at the museums and arranging school visits to educate the children about the sources of their culture and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
,
as well
as arranging tours for visitors.

There is no doubt about the importance of the English
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
as a part of our new world, albeit, it doesn't take away any of the significance of our beloved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
tongue, and there should never be a choice between learning both, in fact they should go hand in hand helping us unite as one with English and maintain our uniqueness and individuality with our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
spoken tongues!

IELTS academic Learning English language vs local languages

Academic
  American English
6 paragraphs
322 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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