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is it working or not so i am just checking it.

is it working or not so i am just checking it. WqeW0

It is true that the importance of ownership of a house is considered one of the essential factors to lead a happy and healthy life in some parts of the world. This preference may stem from cultural norms of society as well as being affected by the rise of consumarism. Satisfying as it may sound, it might, in fact, have negative consequences in individuals lives. Two external factors seem to have a huge influence on the choice people make when they face the dilemma of purchasing their own houses or renting ones. One reason triggering people's desire to have an purchased apartment is the way they have grown up. Traditionally, some societies are used to owning their own house from childhood. In Asian countries, for example, the family bond is very strong and younger generation inherit their homes from their parents or grandparents. Having that privilege in mind, they may refuse to sell them and instead, they prefer staying home. In this way, they are unlikely to worry about being homeless when they retire. In other parts of the world, however, consumer society avoid renting a home in the hope that they can buy one themselves if they save up enough money to afford a dream house. A perfect house is not only a representative of their social status but it is also one of the factors to fulfill their needs. As a result, the essence of possessing a private home is increasingly becoming the focus of population. However it might seem attractive, the tendency to purchase a house comes with its own price in our personal lives. The effort to save up more may do little to buy a house if nothing is done about earning more money. Those who are not able to afford may procrastinate to marry until they own a house. This may lead to competition in the workplace in order to earn more. Emotional breakdown, anxiety, stress, and other health-related issues will follow as a result of the desire to own a private shelter. In conclusion, it might be better to adopt the modern lifestyle and rent a house regardless of the reasons mentioned above even if they may seem more satisfying. Not all people can afford that. In my opinion, heath comes first, and we are highly adoptable species to survive even without possessing a permanent home but just by renting one.

It is true that the importance of ownership of a You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbuildingboxapartmentdwellingresidenceshack
house
is considered
 one of the essential factors to lead a happy and healthy life in This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
 parts of the world. This preference may stem from cultural norms of society as well
 as being This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :impacted
affected
 by the rise of Possible spelling mistake found.consumerism
consumarism
. Satisfying as it may sound, it might, in fact, have This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:adverse
negative
 consequences in individuals This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :resides
lives
.

Two external factors seem to have a huge influence on the choice This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :createconstructmanufactureproduce
make
 when they face the dilemma of purchasing their This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :possess
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbuildingboxapartmentdwellingresidenceshack
houses
 or renting ones. One reason triggering This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
's desire to have Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'a
an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquired
purchased
 apartment is the way they have grown up. Traditionally
, This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
 societies are This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :exploited
used
 to owning their This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :possess
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbuildingboxapartmentdwellingresidenceshack
house
 from childhood. In Asian countries, for example
, the family bond is This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:extremelyimmenselysupremelysuperb
very
 strong and younger generation inherit their You use this word too often, consider replacing it withhutdormitoryapartmentdwellingpalaceresort
homes
 from their parents or grandparents. Having that privilege in mind, they may refuse to sell them and instead
, they prefer staying home. In this way, they are unlikely to worry about being homeless when they retire. In other parts of the world, however
, consumer society avoid renting a home in the hope that they can This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :purchase
buy
 one themselves if they save up This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:abundance
enough
 money to afford a dream You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbuildingboxapartmentdwellingresidenceshack
house
. A perfect You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbuildingboxapartmentdwellingresidenceshack
house
 is not This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :exclusively
only
 a representative of their social status This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:on the contrary
but
 it is also
 one of the factors to fulfill their needs. As a result
, the essence of possessing a private home is increasingly
 becoming the focus of population.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?However,
However
 it might seem attractive, the tendency to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquire
purchase
 a You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbuildingboxapartmentdwellingresidenceshack
house
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :approachesarrives
comes
 with its This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :possess
own
 price in our personal This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :resides
lives
. The effort to save up more may do This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:tiny
little
 to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :purchase
buy
 a You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbuildingboxapartmentdwellingresidenceshack
house
 if nothing is done
 about earning more money. Those who are not able to afford may procrastinate to marry until they This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :possess
own
 a You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbuildingboxapartmentdwellingresidenceshack
house
. This may lead to competition in the workplace in order to earn more. Emotional breakdown, anxiety, This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :accentuate
stress
, and other health-related issues will follow as a result
 of the desire to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :possess
own
 a private shelter.

In conclusion
, it might be better to adopt the modern lifestyle and rent a You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbuildingboxapartmentdwellingresidenceshack
house
 regardless of the reasons mentioned above even if they may seem more satisfying. Not all This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 can afford that. In my opinion, heath This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :approachesarrives
comes
first
, and we are highly
 adoptable species to survive even without possessing a permanent home This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:on the contrary
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:merely
just
 by renting one. 