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incidents and injuries per million PMT,2002

incidents and injuries per million PMT, 2002 O6K7k
The bar chart illustrates the incidents and injuries in several transportations in 2002. Overall, the incidents cases in all transportations are higher than the injuries cases. Another fact worth noticing is that the highest cases in both injuries and incidents were occurred in demand response. As can be seen from the bar chat, by comparing all the data, the figure for demand response took the highest rank in incidents and injuries cases with 225 and 173. This was ten times as higher as the figure of the lowest rank is commuter rail with 225 to 20 in incidents and 173 to 17 in injuries. Moving on the others, light rail had the same cases as bus in incidents, 76, took the second rank and this was followed by heavy rail (35). In injuries, bus took the second rank with 66 cases. Ranked in the subsequent positions were light rail and heavy rail (39 and 35 respectively).
The bar chart illustrates the
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incidents
and
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injuries
in several transportations in 2002.
Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
incidents
cases in all transportations are higher than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
injuries
cases. Another fact worth noticing is that the highest cases in both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
injuries
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
incidents
were occurred
in demand response.

As can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the bar chat, by comparing all the data, the figure for demand response took the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rank
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
incidents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
injuries
cases with 225 and 173. This was ten times as
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higher
as the figure of the lowest
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rank
is commuter
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rail
with 225 to 20 in
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incidents
and 173 to 17 in injuries.

Moving on the others, light
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rail
had the same cases as bus in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
incidents
, 76, took the second
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rank
and this
was followed
by heavy
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rail
(35). In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
injuries
, bus took the second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rank
with 66 cases. Ranked in the subsequent positions were light
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rail
and heavy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rail
(39 and 35
respectively
).
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IELTS academic incidents and injuries per million PMT, 2002

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
156 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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