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hydro electricity production layout

hydro electricity production layout EwyBq
A glance at the flowchart provides the basic layout of electricity generation by the hydroelectric power station. It can be seen that water is the key factor for generating electricity in this way. First of all, the diagram shows that the water flow of the river has been protected by Dam to create the reservoir, Which is the initial part of hydroelectricity generation. Actually, there is a number of gates to control the water reservation in the Dam. When electricity generation is needed time high-pressure water passes through the high level to the low level. On the other hand, water passes by other gates if the water reservation level is more than high. Secondly and more importantly, a power station can produce electricity by using a generator, which is the main part of the layout. Actually, water flow runs the turbines and turbines can transfer this energy to the generator for electricity generation in the day time. After that electricity has transferred to the national grid using power lines. Thus, it is interesting to note that the additional pump is used to transfer water from the low-level reservoir to the high-level reservoir in the nighttime because water reservations need to maintain the standard water level for hydroelectricity generation.
A glance at the flowchart provides the basic layout of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electricity
generation by the hydroelectric power station. It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is the key factor for generating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electricity
in this way.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the diagram
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
flow of the river has
been protected
by Dam to create the reservoir, Which is the initial part of hydroelectricity generation. Actually, there is a number of gates to control the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
reservation in the Dam.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electricity
generation
is needed
time high-pressure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
passes through the high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
to the low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
.
On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
passes by other gates if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
reservation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
is more than high.

Secondly
and more
importantly
, a power station can produce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electricity
by using a generator, which is the main part of the layout.

Actually,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
flow runs the turbines and turbines can transfer this energy to the generator for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electricity
generation in the day time.

“After” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
After
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electricity
has transferred to the national grid using power lines.

Thus
, it is interesting to note that the additional pump is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to transfer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
from the low-level reservoir to the high-level reservoir in the nighttime
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
reservations need to maintain the standard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
for hydroelectricity generation.
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IELTS academic hydro electricity production layout

Academic
  American English
6 paragraphs
208 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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