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Growth in wages in G7 nations

Growth in wages in G7 nations QRGwb
The graph illustrates how salaries changed in G7 countries between 2000-2007 and 2008-2012. It can be clearly seen that the UK and the US had peak figures in the first time period, whereas Japan hit it's highest point in second period. Other countries ( Canada, France, Germany) remained stable the whole time. In the first chart we can see that the Great Briton and America are domineering. The UK hits the peak of nearly 5% in 2000. It's figures stay above the axes all the time expect for one year (2005). The situations is similar with the US and Canada. However, as for the last one, it's figures harshly go down from 2001 to 2003 reaching the bottom of approximately -1 in 2002. The figures of Japan and Italy were kept in the range from 2 to -2, while France and Germany maintained stability most of the years. From the second graph it is obvious that there is a decline in the figures of the UK and Italy comparing to the 2000-2007. The Great Briton reaches it's bottom in 2011 ( nearly - 2) and Japan does both in 2009 and 2012 ( more than - 1). There is a drop in the percentage in the US in comparison to the first chart. It's figures do not go higher than 1, on the contrary the also do not go down lower than -1. The values of Canada, France and Germany remained nearly at the same level as on the first graph, whereas the figures of Italy slightly decreased up to almost 2 in 2012.
The graph illustrates how salaries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
in G7 countries between 2000-2007 and 2008-2012. It can be
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the UK and the US had peak
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
time period, whereas Japan hit
Did you mean "its highest point"?
it's highest point
in second period. Other countries
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
Canada, France, Germany) remained stable the whole time.

In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
chart we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that the Great Briton and America are domineering. The UK hits the peak of
nearly
5% in 2000.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
It's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
stay above the axes all the time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
for one year (2005). The situations
You should probably use: "are".
is
similar with the US and Canada.
However
, as for the last one,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
harshly
go down from 2001 to 2003 reaching the bottom of approximately -1 in 2002. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
of Japan and Italy were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
in the range from 2 to -2, while France and Germany maintained stability most of the years.

From the second graph it is obvious that there is a decline in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
of the UK and Italy comparing to the 2000-2007. The Great Briton reaches
Did you mean "its" (possessive pronoun) instead of 'it's' (short form of 'it is')?
it's
bottom in 2011
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
nearly
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
2) and Japan does both in 2009 and 2012
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
more than
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
1). There is a drop in the percentage in the US
in comparison
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
chart.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
It's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
do not go higher than 1,
on the contrary
the
also
do not go down lower than -1. The values of Canada, France and Germany remained
nearly
at the same level as on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
graph, whereas the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
of Italy
slightly
decreased up to almost 2 in 2012.
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IELTS academic Growth in wages in G7 nations

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
264 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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