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gross domestic product from It survice industry of the UK (as a % of GDP)

gross domestic product from It survice industry of the UK (as a % of GDP) OrL0E
The bar chart illustrates the percentage of Gross Domestic Product from IT and Service industry in the UK, between 1992 and 2000. Overall, it could be seen that the GDP from It industry has increased over the 8 years period. To begin, in 1992 compared to both industries 6% of GDP amount is more than the other industry which was from service industry, whereas the component 7% of GDP from service industry. The GDP accounted for 8% from It industry, while the service industry produced more than 6% of GDP in the UK. Although the percentage of GDP produced by service industry has climbed up much fewer than in 1994. It was almost 7%. But in the same year the GDP which is produced by It industry has declined at around 7. 9%. According to the bar graph, the percentage of GDP rose sharply at 12% from IT industry in 1998 as well as from service industry, 7. 8% of GDP produced in the UK. To sum, over the 8 year period the highest percentage of 15%accounted for GDP from IT industry in 2000. The service industry produced at around 8% of GDP in 2000. Overall, from 1992 to 2000 GDP has produced from IT industry more than the service industry.
The bar chart illustrates the
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percentage
of Gross Domestic Product from IT and
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Service
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industry
in the UK, between 1992 and 2000.
Overall
, it could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the GDP from It
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industry
has increased over the 8 years period.

To
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begin
, in 1992 compared to both
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industries
6% of GDP amount is more than the other
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industry
which was from
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service
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industry
, whereas the component 7% of GDP from
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service
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industry
. The GDP accounted for 8% from It
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industry
, while the
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service
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industry
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produced
more than 6% of GDP in the UK.
“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
the
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percentage
of GDP
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produced
by
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service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
has climbed up much fewer than in 1994. It was almost 7%.
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But
in the same year the GDP which is
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produced
by It
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industry
has declined at around 7. 9%.

According to the bar graph, the
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percentage
of GDP rose
sharply
at 12% from IT
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industry
in 1998
as well
as from
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service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
, 7. 8% of GDP
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produced
in the UK.

To sum, over the
When a number forms part of an adjectival compound, use a hyphen: "8-year"
8 year
period the highest
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percentage
of 15%accounted for GDP from IT
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industry
in 2000. The
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service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
produced
at around 8% of GDP in 2000.
Overall
, from 1992 to 2000 GDP has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
produced
from IT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
more than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
.
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IELTS academic gross domestic product from It survice industry of the UK (as a % of GDP)

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
211 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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