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Extinction has always been a major concern for any human kind

Extinction has always been a major concern for any human kind JqXD5
Extinction has always been a major concern for any human kind. Not just about the fear of human extinction but also other important things in life such as the environment which consist of plants and animal. Even though it has been a long discussed problem, I do agree that there are still more problems that occur when we talked about environmental problems such as pollution, flood and global warming. It is true that plants and animals live in coherence with humans. The fact that it is a mutualism symbiosis, it makes us responsible for their existence too. But the current fact that humans keep on developing new things and has other interest, it makes us forget that we need those ecosystem within our lives which leads to the destructive things that we do to the plants and animals ecosystem for our own interests. Not just the fact that we destroy the natural ecosystem, there are other environmental problems that also happen nowadays such as pollution, flood and global warming that we have face for over a centuries. From my point of view, these kinds of environmental problems are more likely to affect human beings and environment itself. Having a lot of pollutions and disasterous problems can bring more direct impact to human lives compared to the affect natural ecosystem destruction. Even though that there are still a lot of environmental problems that we're facing, the first and easiest solution for all of the problems is to be aware of it and start to think the impact of the things that we do in our daily lives. In conclusion, both problems have their own consequences for human lives. Whether it will impacted us directly or indirectly, we are the one that is responsible for fixing these problems for our future generation.
Extinction has always been a major concern for any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
kind. Not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
about the fear of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
extinction
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
things in life such as the environment which consist of plants and animal.
Even though
it has been a long discussed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
, I do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that there are
still
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
that occur when we talked about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
such as pollution, flood and global warming. It is true that plants and animals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in coherence with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
. The fact that it is a mutualism symbiosis, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
us responsible for their existence too.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
on developing new things and has other interest, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
us forget that we need
Did you mean "this ecosystem" or "those ecosystems"?
those ecosystem
within our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
which leads to the destructive things that we do to the plants and animals ecosystem for our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
interests. Not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
the fact that we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
the natural ecosystem, there are other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
that
also
happen nowadays such as pollution, flood and global warming that we have face for over
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "a century" or simply "centuries"?
a centuries
. From my point of view, these kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are more likely to affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings and environment itself. Having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
pollutions and
Possible spelling mistake found.
disasterous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
can bring more direct impact to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
compared to the
Did you mean "effect"?
affect
natural ecosystem destruction.
Even though
that there are
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
that we're facing, the
first
and easiest solution for
Consider using "all the".
all of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
is to be aware of it and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the impact of the things that we do in our daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
.
In conclusion
, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
consequences for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
. Whether it will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "impact"
impacted
us
directly
or
indirectly
, we are the one
that is
responsible for fixing these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
for our future generation.
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IELTS academic Extinction has always been a major concern for any human kind

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
300 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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