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Essay one about line chart

Essay one about line chart qam1E
This line chart illustrates data about capacity numbers in one country from 1971 to 2005. Overall, it is clear from the graph that the ratio rised during these times. If we compare 1976with 1999, we will notice that the rate increased dramatically from 5. 7% to over 20% in the age of 18-29. However, between 30 to 44 years old, the obesity numbers remained stable approximately 15. 0% in 1971 and 1976. While, the following years (1988 to 1999), the rate rose speedly from 15% to 30%. A close look at the next two categories ages, which were 45-64 and 65-79. These two capacity rates ages provide evidence the numbers remained unchange around 14% to 15% in 1971 to 1976, then the ratio fluctuated until rised-up. In conclusion, the obesity numbers in per city during specific shows the percentages were fluctuated.
This line chart illustrates data about capacity
numbers
in one country from 1971 to 2005.
Overall
, it is
clear
from the graph that the ratio
rised
during these times.

If we compare 1976with 1999, we will notice that the rate increased
dramatically
from 5. 7% to over 20% in the age of 18-29.
However
,
between 30 to 44
years
old
, the obesity
numbers
remained stable approximately 15. 0% in 1971 and 1976. While, the following years (1988 to 1999), the rate rose
speedly
from 15% to 30%. A close look at the
next
two categories ages, which were 45-64 and 65-79. These two capacity rates ages provide evidence the
numbers
remained
unchange
around 14% to 15% in 1971 to 1976, then the ratio fluctuated until
rised-up
.

In conclusion
, the obesity
numbers
in per city during specific
shows
the percentages
were fluctuated
.

IELTS academic Essay one about line chart

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
141 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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