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e given line graphs illustrate the data about Britishers, who spent money for their offsprings' sports such as Football, Athletics, Swimming from 2008 to 2014.

e given line graphs illustrate the data about Britishers, who spent money for their offsprings' sports such as Football, Athletics, Swimming from 2008 to 2014. pR8Kd
The given line graphs illustrate the data about Britishers, who spent money for their offsprings' sports such as Football, Athletics, Swimming from 2008 to 2014. Overall, it can be seen that average monthly expenditure of perents for their children's sports gradually increased by the passing year, at the same time the maximum number of children interested in Football. In begin with, in the year 2008 monthly 20 pounds was spent by Britishers for their offspring's sports. However the amount was increased and reached at 25 pound after 2 years. Furthurmore there are 28 pound was monthly spent by British parents in the year 2012 then the amount was again rose and touched at high by 32 pounds in 2014. In the second line graph the highest number of students participate in Football game and from 2008 to 2014 their numbers were slightly increased and reached at 8. 5 million in the year 2014. While in the starting phase Swimmers were higher than the Athlets, which were 2. 5 million and 0. 5 million respectively, but in the ending the the trend shows vice versa means Athlets and swimmers switched their position with eachother and reached at almost 5 million and 4. 5 million in the year 2014.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
line graphs illustrate the data about Britishers, who spent money for their
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "offspring", the plural form of the noun 'offspring'?
offsprings
' sports such as Football, Athletics, Swimming from 2008 to 2014.

Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that average monthly expenditure of
Possible spelling mistake found.
perents
for their children's sports
gradually
increased by the passing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
, at the same time the maximum number of children interested in Football.

In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2008 monthly
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
20 pounds
was spent
by Britishers for their offspring's sports.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
the amount
was increased
and reached at
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
25 pound
after 2 years.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Furthurmore
there are
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
28 pound
was monthly spent by British parents in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2012 then the amount was again
Consider using a past participle here: "risen".
rose
and touched at high by
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
32 pounds
in 2014.

In the second line graph the highest number of students participate in Football game and from 2008 to 2014 their numbers were
slightly
increased and reached at 8. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2014. While in the starting phase Swimmers were higher than the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Athlets
, which were 2. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
and 0. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
respectively
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in the ending
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "the" or "the" is left.
the the
trend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
vice versa means
Possible spelling mistake found.
Athlets
and swimmers switched their position with
Possible spelling mistake found.
eachother
and reached at almost 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
and 4. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2014.
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IELTS academic e given line graphs illustrate the data about Britishers, who spent money for their offsprings' sports such as Football, Athletics, Swimming from 2008 to 2014.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
207 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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