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Describle the most memorable event in your life

Describle the most memorable event in your life kW732
My last year birthday was the most memorable party. It was different than any other parties. I invited my family and all my friends to come over. They brought me all kind of presents for my birthday. We had really fun, played games, cooked and danced. We spent most time on playing games. We told jokes, introduced each other and joked around. There were three different group of ages on my birthday. Elders, teenagers, and children. Elders, they were chatting with their group. Teenagers were joking around and children were playing around. After that, all the girls cooked and all the boys helped them out. We cooked different type of foods. For elders and children we cooked like rice, chicken, pork etc. For adult, we cooked spicy foods like fried spicy shrimps and spicy soup. And then, we put all the foods on a long table and asked the eldest person to pray. While we were eating, each person had to tell either good or bad things about me. At first, everybody was afraid to start it. So my mother started saying like this "my son still wet in the bed till he was fourteen years old. " Everybody laughed at me on that joke. A few minutes later, my girlfriend got up suddenly and said, "he is a good kisser. " and everybody was like laughing and cheering at me. That day my stomach got numb because I laughed too much. We had really fun that day. When I saw an event like this, I talked to myself "you do not get to experience or see like this so often. " I was just so happy and this is the reason why my last year birthday was my most memorable party.
My last year birthday was the most memorable party. It was
different
than
any other parties. I invited my family and all my friends to
come
over. They brought me all kind of presents for my birthday. We had
really
fun, played games, cooked and danced. We spent most time on playing games.
We
told
jokes, introduced each other and joked around. There were three
different
group
of ages on my birthday. Elders,
teenagers
, and children. Elders, they were chatting with their group.
Teenagers
were joking around and children were playing around. After that, all the girls cooked and all the boys
helped
them out. We cooked
different
type of foods. For elders and children we cooked like rice, chicken, pork etc. For adult, we cooked spicy foods like fried spicy shrimps and spicy soup. And then, we put all the foods on a long table and asked the eldest person to pray. While we were eating, each person had to
tell
either
good
or
bad
things about me. At
first
, everybody was afraid to
start
it.
So
my mother
started
saying like this
"
my son
still
wet in the bed till he was fourteen years
old
.
"
Everybody laughed at me on that joke. A few minutes later, my girlfriend
got
up
suddenly
and said,
"
he is a
good
kisser.
"
and
everybody was like laughing and cheering at me. That day my stomach
got
numb
because
I laughed too much. We had
really
fun that day. When I
saw
an
event
like this, I talked to myself
"
you do not
get
to experience or
see
like this
so
often
.
"
I was
just
so
happy and this is the reason why my last year birthday was my most memorable party.
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IELTS academic Describle the most memorable event in your life

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
292 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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