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describing changes in a map

describing changes in a map j9Yx1
The maps illustrate revisions of Clowick Arts centre from 2005 until now. As it's clear, There were a lot of changes in buildings and yard over years. One of the most significant changes is the outside area that was designed over these decades. Plants were grown; Plus, An outdoor exhibition and performance area was placed. The cafe was moved behind the gallery. Now, The drama studio is built between the meeting room1 and cinema. Center hall and cinema were combined but now are separated and moved next to each other in the top right-hand corner of the campus. The galleries were got together; However, Meeting rooms were dissociated. In the past, Toilet was spacious; Whereas, Today it's smaller and was moved behind of concert hall. Thus, We can see that COLWICK ARTS CENTRE is  advanced and fascinated now in comparison to 2005.
The maps illustrate revisions of
Clowick
Arts
centre
from 2005 until 
now
. As it's
clear
, There were
a lot of
changes
in buildings and yard over years.

One of the most significant
changes
is the outside area that
was designed
over these decades. Plants
were grown
; Plus, An outdoor exhibition and performance area
was placed
.

The
cafe
was
moved
behind the gallery.
Now
, The drama studio
is built
between the meeting room1 and cinema.

Center hall and cinema
were combined
but
now
are separated
and
moved
next
to each other in the top right-hand corner of the campus. The galleries were
got
together;
However
, Meeting rooms
were dissociated
.

In the past, Toilet was spacious; Whereas,
Today
it's smaller and was
moved
behind of concert hall.

Thus
, We can
see
that COLWICK ARTS
CENTRE
is
 
advanced and fascinated
now
in comparison to 2005.
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IELTS academic describing changes in a map

Academic
  American English
6 paragraphs
139 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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