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The tabe gives information about female workforce and female managers in five countries

The tabe gives information about female workforce and female managers in five countries LG6K1
The table ptovides information about the perecentages of girle how were a managers and workfoce in five difference countries. Overall, The united states was most popular country of both types (workforce and managers), while Egypt was the least populer. Australia rat was about 42% in workfoce being higher than managers rate by approximataly 41%. However, the figure showed Egypt has got 20% in workfoce was the least populer in all countrice, and 12% in managers. Then pecentage of women who were workforce in Japan was quite leas than Australia woman by only 1 perecentag. while in mangemant were got sami rate of Egypt. Moreover, the figure experienced rate of woman workforce in srilanka by almost 37%, also that was least perecentage of manager in all countrice by only 9%. Furthermore, The united states rate was about 46% in workforce, That was moste popular in all, In contact, women managers has got highest perecentages by almost 43% compered of all others countrice.
The table
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ptovides
information about the
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perecentages
of
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girle
how were a
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managers
and
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workfoce
in five difference countries.
Overall
, The
The proper noun "United States" needs to be capitalized.
united states
was
Did you mean "the most"?
most
popular country of both types
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(workforce
and
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managers)
, while Egypt was the least
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populer
.

Australia rat was about 42% in
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workfoce
being higher than
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managers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
by
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approximataly
41%.
However
, the figure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
Egypt has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
20% in
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workfoce
was the least
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populer
in all
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countrice
, and 12% in
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managers
. Then
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pecentage
of women who were
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workforce
in Japan was quite leas than Australia woman by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
1
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perecentag
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
while
in
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mangemant
were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
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sami
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rate
of Egypt.

Moreover
, the figure experienced
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rate
of woman
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workforce
in
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srilanka
by almost 37%,
also
that was least
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perecentage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
manager
in all
Possible spelling mistake found.
countrice
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
9%.
Furthermore
, The
The proper noun "United States" needs to be capitalized.
united states
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
was about 46% in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workforce
, That was
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moste
popular in all, In contact, women
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managers
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
highest
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perecentages
by almost 43%
Did you mean the verb "compared" or the noun "compèred" (master of ceremonies)?
compered
of all others
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countrice
.
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IELTS academic The tabe gives information about female workforce and female managers in five countries

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
161 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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