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Daily sales for winter and summer seasons

Daily sales for winter and summer seasons ok9DV
The bar graph illustrates average daily sales, by number of servings during winter and summer seasons at vista cafe. Overall, hot servings of coffee, and soup were high during winter. During summer, both hot and iced drinks are moderately in demand during both seasons. During winter, hot servings dominated. For instance hot coffee had about 75 instances, followed by soup at 50 servings. While cold drinks as iced coffee which had nearly no serve in the season and icecream sales of slightly more than 20 servings. On the other hand, summer had average demand for both hot and cold servings. The season was dominated by iced coffee at 40 sold, then ice cream at about 35 servings then 30 and about 25 servings for hot coffee and soup respectively. Salad was equaly demanded in both winter and summer seasons In conclusion, more hot servings observed during winter while cold drinks averagely served throughout the seasons. Salad sales were maintained in both instances.
The bar graph illustrates average daily sales, by number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
servings
during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
winter
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
summer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seasons
at vista
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
.

Overall
, hot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
servings
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
, and soup were high during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
winter
. During
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
summer
, both hot and iced drinks are
moderately
in demand during both seasons.

During
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
winter
, hot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
servings
dominated.
For instance
hot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
had about 75 instances, followed by soup at 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
servings
. While
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
drinks as iced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
which had
nearly
no serve in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
season
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
icecream
sales of
slightly
more than 20 servings.

On the other hand
,
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summer
had average demand for both hot and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
servings
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
season
was dominated
by iced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
at 40 sold, then ice cream at about 35
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
servings
then 30 and about 25
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
servings
for hot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
and soup
respectively
. Salad was
Possible spelling mistake found.
equaly
demanded in both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
winter
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
summer
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
seasons


In conclusion
, more hot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
servings
observed during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
winter
while
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
drinks
averagely
served throughout the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seasons
. Salad sales
were maintained
in both instances.
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IELTS academic Daily sales for winter and summer seasons

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
162 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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