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Compare the birth rate and death rate in New zealand

Compare the birth rate and death rate in New zealand J0EqD
The line graph illustrates the changes regarding the birth and death rates in New Zealand from 1901 and the projections until 2101. Overall, the birth rate and death tolls both witnessed increases over the period shown. It is interesting to note that the number of children born was much higher than the number of people dying, but it is anticipated that the former will surpass the latter in the future. If we look at the first half of the period, the birth rate recorded started at 20, 000, which was slightly more than double that of the death rate. After that, despite pretty wild fluctuations, this figure accelerated to just under 50, 000 in 2001. Meanwhile, there was a gradual rise in the death rate, escalating to under 30, 000 in the same year. Regarding the second half of the period, unlike the previous time, the death rate is set to experience a steady fall, dropping to over 40, 000 in 2101. By stark contrast, predictions show that the birth rate will soar, overtaking its counterpart in 2041 before reaching a peak of nearly 60, 000 in 2101. This meant that the number of people passing away will be close to 20, 000 higher than the number of children born at the end of the period.
The line graph illustrates the
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changes
regarding the
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birth
and death
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rates
in New Zealand from 1901 and the projections until 2101.

Overall
, the
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birth
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rate
and death tolls both witnessed increases over the
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period
shown. It is interesting to note that the
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number
of children born was much higher than the
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number
of
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people
dying,
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but
it
is anticipated
that the former will surpass the latter in the future.

If we look at the
first
half of the
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period
, the
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birth
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rate
recorded
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started
at 20, 000, which was
slightly
more than double that of the death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
. After that, despite pretty wild fluctuations, this figure accelerated to
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just
under 50, 000 in 2001. Meanwhile, there was a gradual rise in the death
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rate
, escalating to under 30, 000 in the same year.

Regarding the second half of the
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period
, unlike the previous time, the death
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rate
is set
to experience a steady fall, dropping to over 40, 000 in 2101. By stark contrast, predictions
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show
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
birth
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rate
will soar, overtaking its counterpart in 2041
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before
reaching a peak of
nearly
60, 000 in 2101. This meant that the
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number
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
passing away will be close to 20, 000 higher than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of children born at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
.

IELTS academic Compare the birth rate and death rate in New zealand

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
216 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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